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7 Bumps

"white sheep"

Are you the good one in the family,and yet get ignored by everyone because the screwups need more attention(or so they say)? It hurts my feelings so bad that my mom will do so much for her neice and her baby,and yet,the only phone calls I get start with"can you do me a favor".My son is her only grandson,and she never seems to care how he is,orwants to see him.She'll dish out a ton of money to my cousin,yet when my son's birthday rolls around,we get the here's 10 bucks,I didn't get time to get him anything. X-mas is the same way. Its not the money,I just want my son to know her. He thinks her name is Grandma.


Asked by butterflyblue19 at 11:10 AM on Jun. 24, 2010 in Relationships

Level 50 (383,297 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • My parents don't do it - but to my Granny, my cousin and I don't exist. It's ALL about my brother, the black sheep. Literally, the last time I talked to her, all she did was talk about my brother. There was a brief mention of "Oh, and how is your pregnancy going?" but it was followed by "Now, your brother's girlfriend is a month further along than you are, right?"

    I quit caring at about age 10. Honestly, I don't feel that I'm missing out on any great relationship.

    Answer by DusterMommy at 11:41 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • Agh, yes I've experienced the "Curse of Competence"
    I don't know how to change it but have noticed the "better" you are at things in this world, the more that is put on you. For example, my hubby works 16+ hours a day on salary with no overtime. He doesn't get the "bonus's" you'd think due to his very high work ethic. Nope instead he gets the Sh*t work cause he is the one that will DO IT RIGHT. Again the curse of competence......
    Let me know if you can figure out how to stop it :) Good luck....

    Answer by MamaCharity at 11:16 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • I'm the only child so no... but my DH is the white sheep out of his family. His brother has always been in trouble, and my DH has been the "good" child compared to him. Sometimes, I even get the feeling that our children are the "good" kids from his parents as well, because his nephew has autism and lives with them, along with his brother. It actually pisses me off that they're favoritism is SO obvious, even though we're the ones getting the "benefits" out of it.
    And yes, sometimes, DH's mother will only call my DH to bitch and complain about his brother, and to ask us to do something for them, because the brother will not. It gets aggravating.

    Answer by ManicMomma02 at 11:22 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • No I am the black sheep but it did not get me more attention it just made them ignore me. I am the black sheep because I am not married and had two kids and will not stop swearing like a sailor on shore leave . LOL

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 11:14 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • I guess i kind of am the good one. I never got ignored, if anything i ignore them because they are all nuts!

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:17 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • thats crummy... yeh. i feel that way sometimes, too... i say just tell her that she needs to treat your son like the grandson he is... don't worry about how she treats you... you are an adult and can handle it. but tell her if she wants to be considered a grandma, she'd better treat him like her grandson.

    Answer by gracefulsky at 11:18 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • Oh yes. I am the white sheep. My older brother is on drugs and always in and out of rehab and jail. He is always fighting and lives off of my dad has a son who he never does anything for, and his son lives with my grandma. My younger sister is wild, always getting drunk and going out with a different man every week, and maxing out my dad's credit cards and wrecking brand new cars. And then there is me Stay at home mom to a 15 month old who has been with the same man for years. My dad has been a single dad all our lives and he tries his best but it seems like he never calls me unless it is to tell me about the last thing my brother or sister done that way bad. I never get a call just to see how me and my son are doing, it is stressful at times but I guess I have learned to just deal with it.

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 11:32 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • I am the black sheep because I am the "white sheep" I am the good girl, the one who follows laws, is kind to people, generally a do-gooder. The rest of the family is not so great.

    Answer by mom2queenie2004 at 11:47 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • My in laws are this way with my husband. It's really sad to see.

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 11:48 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • I'm the good one :) My extended family tells me all the time that the could swear I'm adopted because I'm nothing like my parents or siblings. My brothers are just a bunch of trouble making losers that needs to grow up and act like adults. I'm not what they call a "good girl" but I'm not getting in trouble with the law like they are.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 11:51 AM on Jun. 24, 2010