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3 Bumps

How did you tell family?

I know my family is going to react negatively to this pregnancy. For no other reason then they think 5 kids is way too many. They are taken care of and everything. The only reason is they think we have too many kids. I know they are going to react badly. They didn't like the idea of four kids.

How did you handle the negativity from family when announcing your pregnancy?

Thanks1

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:53 PM on Jun. 25, 2010 in Pregnancy

Answers (10)
  • Honestly, if you already know that they are going to react negatively its a good thing because you can prepare yourself. However, if you are taking care of your children (as mentioned) than it is really none of their business how many children you have.
    The best way to tell them is just to say it outright and ignore any criticism. Your taking care of your kids and thats all that matters.
    They are the ones who will lose out with their negativity.
    CFWife

    Answer by CFWife at 12:57 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • if I knew then what I know now, I would have told my dad first. He was the only one who screamed like a little school girl and said "I'm gonna be an OPA!!!!". everyone else treated it like a teenage pregnancy crisis. Mom told me to get an abortion and that SO and I had to get married, my sister was very sympathetic asking if I was ok and she was very concerned since the baby would be a "welfare baby" 9which he wasnt but guess my financial status was "poor" in her eyes). I was 27, college graduate, full time job, responsible adult...but in their eyes I was an 11 year old playing with barbies lol. I was already hormonal, so I didnt take the negative reactions very well. My mom apologized a few hours after the initial conversation (which was over the phone because she's long distance). My sister didnt quite apologize, but she was very excited once she realized I was a grown woman and taking care of myself and the growing baby.
    Owl_Feather

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 12:57 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • I'm sorry your family is so negative! I haven't experienced that but I would just let them know no matter how they react. It will be hard but its your life and having a big family is what you want. I'm sure your family would adjust within time! GL mama! =)
    Artistachica

    Answer by Artistachica at 12:57 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • with my first, myfamily was less than enthusiastic about my pregnancy. but we just came out and told them. we didnt try to hide it, or ait and see how things went. we just told the,.sometimes thats all you can do. you will prbably stress more about how and when to tell them than thier actual reaction!
    erika_wright

    Answer by erika_wright at 12:57 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • Ditto to CFWife. Congrats to you and your Husband though! We are hoping for 8-10 kids ourselves (we currently have 4).
    Mommy_0f_many

    Answer by Mommy_0f_many at 12:58 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • I was married early and two wks later was pregnant after we got married. I told my mom she acted happy but you could tell that she wasn't thrilled. My ex hubby mom wasn't happy at all. I was, he was. I cried a lot too cause his side was very negative. When I was 7 months, she being a girl and we were moving away they started being nicer and begged us to stay. So the best advice I could give you is what I went through with my ex hubby parents and foster parents was nod your head and then say well this is what we want, I love you but this is what I'm going to do. They will get over it. It's your life and if you can take care four and your pregnant now with the fifth then you can take care of that one to its your life they are not the ones supporting those youngins you and your hubby are and as long as they are taken care of that's all they should care about. They'll come around. Good Luck.
    MrsMorton080508

    Answer by MrsMorton080508 at 1:25 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • sorry to hear that :) but look on the bright side its your decision and you are going to welcome another little blessing regardless of what other people think. i'm kind of in the same situation but not with my family with my hubbys fam his mom doesnt like me because she was really close to her sons because she has four total and she compared my 1st son to animals, my 2nd daughter wasnt my hubbys because she came out with a dark blonde hair and looks like me , and now that im expecting my 3 rd me and my hubby decided not to even bother to tell them because we know the reaction they are going to have and especially one of his brothers [when i was pregnant with my 2nd he said in a rude voice why didnt u use protection! what are you planning to do ]and he has 5 kids of his own :( i felt bad but we decided together theyll find out sooner or later when my belly gets bigger but im not telling them anything! good luck !
    mommyof2chasmin

    Answer by mommyof2chasmin at 4:49 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • I just didn't tell people.


    I'm about to have my 5th in about 3 weeks.  My in-laws found out around 28 weeks or so because my husband started teasing them about it (a friend of the family had a baby and the poor guy has been trying for a son and just got remarried and had another girl...he's got like 6 of them now).


    My dad, who I live with, found out at 32 weeks because I needed him to watch my 4yo while I had my ultrasound.  Other people found out when I posted it to Facebook around 30 weeks.  It was getting hard to hide it from people in real life but I didn't feel like listening to the crap I get from everyone.  I didn't tell anyone about my 4yo either.  My dad found out the day after she was born because he happened to call me.

    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 7:14 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • Same boat here. We have three all together. About 2 years ago I was pregnant and when we told everybody you would have thought the sky was falling. All I heard was "how are you going to manage 4" (my husband is a truck driver) you would have thought I dumped them on them all the time...so far from the truth. I even take them to the dr with me. When I ended up losing the baby you would have thought they were celebrating. My mother actually told me to get over it the day of my D&C because all my children were healthy (ummmm, just lost one, thanks) It was heartbreaking. So here I am 6 weeks pregnant again, and I will save myself the pain of their remarks. If they call while I am in the hospital and ask me where I am then I will tell them, if not EFF EM. They will get the same birth announcement everybody else does, on facebook! And then I will have to hear my poor mother cry about her hurt feelings because she wasn't apart of it.
    ambernicole531

    Answer by ambernicole531 at 10:48 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • Ok so maybe some of that is hormones.....vent over. In truth we are probably worried over something silly cause we are preggers!! Congratulations. I think it is super!!!
    ambernicole531

    Answer by ambernicole531 at 10:50 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

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