Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

My friend had a miscarriage--how do I lend emotional support?

My closest friend had a miscarriage today. This would have been her fourth child and it was an unexpected pregnancy. I think she's blaming herself because at first she was upset when she found out she was pregnant. How can I offer the the support she needs?

 
layh41407

Asked by layh41407 at 6:38 PM on Jun. 25, 2010 in Health

Level 36 (79,415 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Just say that you are sorry and be there for her. Listen to her. Through all 4 of my losses, all I heard were people telling me that it wasn't meant to be and how grateful they are to have their children. Those would be what NOT to say. I hope she finds peace soon.
    Erin814

    Answer by Erin814 at 6:57 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • I am sorry your friend is going through this, a miscarriage is something really hard to go through because often there's unanswered questions as to "why"? I think all you can really do is be there for her, tell her it's ok to cry, try to comfort her and listen to her. At this time she will probably not be in the stage to change her mind about feeling at fault but as time passes by you can reassure her that it was nothing she did, it is hard to come to grips that sometimes miscarriages are a "sign" that it wasn't meant to be at that time. I felt the same way she did when I had mine.
    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 6:42 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • A hug, and a pint of her favorite icecream. Just being there.
    browningmom

    Answer by browningmom at 6:42 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • Just be there if she needs you. She may not want to talk or she may want to scream and cry. Just listen if she wants you to and give her distance if she wants that.
    AmazingAmanda

    Answer by AmazingAmanda at 6:42 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • Just be there for her. Offer to help with childcare, cook a meal,run errands, housework, whatever she needs while she recovers. Just be there when she needs a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 7:10 PM on Jun. 25, 2010

  • Thank you for all of your advice. It is really appreciated. More than words---thanks.
    layh41407

    Comment by layh41407 (original poster) at 10:15 PM on Jun. 25, 2010