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What am I going to do about my 10yr old?!?

I've known my ten yr old dd has like boys since probably around 8yrs old. But its become a very serious problem lately. about a yr & a half ago she started liking them more and now at the age of ten she is becoming out of control with it. She started her period when she was 9 so maybe that has something to do with the hormones & evrything but its scaring me because she does all kinds of thngs to get any kind of attention from boys, today she went to my friends house to play with some younger girls who were around 6-7yrs old but instead of playing with them, my friend told me she was across the parking lot standin in the middle of a bunch of guys who had to be 19-21yrs old, watching them play basketball. Just standing there trying to be noticed. She goes to camp & theres a boy there that she is obsessed with to the point that she didnt want to go on our family vacation for 2wks because she didnt want to be away from him. HELP!!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:40 AM on Jun. 26, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • sounds like she needs therapy.
    i don't mean to alarm you but 1 out of 3 girls are sexually abused before the age of 16!!
    and just asking her if she was abused or molested isn't good enough. trust me, i was asked and i lied. put her in therapy if you can, for a while and see if that helps improve her behavior.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:42 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Wow! I also have a 10 y/o and its the total opposite! Seriously, you need to have a talk with her. She needs to understand the way things work and how her actions can get her in trouble. My 10 y/o knows about sex and also knows that we don't agree with her having a boyfriend or holding hands yet. We explained that holding hands projects an image that isn't good. Of couse, we had to dumb it down so she would understand but she gets it. She isn't into boys yet, or at least she says she isn't. If she is, she's too embarassed to admit it. Which is fine by me.
    Please don't take this the wrong way but how is your relationship with men? Do you date or are you married? If you date, does she see many men coming and going? Does she get enough attention from her dad?
    Good luck!

    Answer by Mel_in_PHX at 1:50 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • My ten yr is boy crazy too but I think back to my 4th and 5th grade year and a few of us were like that. I tell my daughter that there is no room for boyfriends, I will punish her by grounding her if she won't lay off the boy talk when I say too. She seems obsessed as well. I have her in sports and cheerleading this fall to keep her mind busy and give her some self confidence. it's a complex they have and they need more self pride and worth. they aren't getting something from somewhere...I don't know b/c my 8yr old isn't a thing like her sis and my oldest is 16 and she's just as bad, almost begging for a boyfriend but she was sexually abused to a point when she was at her dad's visiting. He didn't do it but he has no respect for women and has made her feel very wierd around guys. I second the counseling. It helped me get past my ex and helped my confidence.

    Answer by Momchipomkids at 2:13 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • My Step-DD is 10 also and she hasn't started her period yet but she has showed very little interest in boys but the interest is there. I would have a very long talk with her and let her know that she is a young lady and all men need to treat her like that at all times.

    Answer by raemommy at 2:18 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Is there any older girls she is around or so. I ask that because I started my period at 11 and I had started taking an interest in boys. The girls in my neighborhood were a little older, not much but there is a difference between 11 yr old and a 13/14 yr old. Me and BF hung around them because there wasnt many girls in our neighborhood. They never pressured us or anything, they protected us but we became curious just because of the things they used to talk about. You know what I mean. So maybe try to figure out if she is hearing things from older cousins or older siblings of friends. It may have sparked some curiousity and I would still have a talk with her as well just to see more so where her thinking is.

    Answer by lilmsnay83 at 3:42 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Please get your daughter in counseling; it seems to me that there is something else going on here...

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:23 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Some girls just need to be the center of attention. As long as she isn't putting herself in any danger, it all sounds normal to me. Just talk to her & leave the communication lines open. Get her involved in other activities like sports, community service, church youth group.

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 10:14 AM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • I am always amazed at people who immediately say "get that child into therapy!" WTF? Anyway, she sounds like she needs a reality check. Are you open with her about sex? About what boys want? Has her self esteem always been dependent on others? I remember starting in 4th grade getting into that 'boy crazy' phase - she sounds like she's hit it full force. You need to talk to her about feeling self-worth from within, maybe get her into activities that she can be proud of like gymnastics or softball. Get her mind on something else!

    Answer by kameka at 4:13 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

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