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3 Bumps

how much would you do for someone like this?

My sister lost her kids almost 2 years ago for abuse and drinking. She did recovery, got them back, and within a few months, lost them again for the same thing. She now only gets supervised visitation, and the only people allowed are me and my mom. My mom is too busy to help, so I'm it.. I love my nephews.. but I cant stand my sister. She steals and lies and expects everyone to believe her and do as she asks..
So, the best day for me to watch the kids is Saturday, but she really wants Sundays cuz that works best for her even though she doesnt work weekends, but is busy with her boyfriend, ....but this is the ONLY day I really get to see my husband. I told her I will take them Saturdays, and I have to meet one of the dads half way ( a long drive) and she refuses to pay for gas...

Dont you thinks she should pay for gas and take the day she gets? She did this to herself...

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:08 PM on Jun. 26, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • This is a really tough situation. I was taking care of my niece and nephew because they were being physically abused and neglected. She had supervised visitation, but felt that it could be whenever she found fit. I talked to the CPS worker about this and they told me to give her my available times and she would have to make it work. I was responsible for the children so I was in charge of what happened and when as long as I allowed her the visitation. If she didnt make it for whatever reason (other than work) it was documented by the CPS worker that was sitting at my house waiting for her to show.

    I say your sister should have to pay for the gas and take the day you give her.
    Trotterswife

    Answer by Trotterswife at 5:13 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • It doesn't sound like she's putting her kids first at all. She should be grateful for you and work around your schedule, her kids should come before her boyfriend. She really needs to learn to be more responsible, and if you give in and give up your time with your husband when she's not working on Saturdays you would only be enabling her.
    luvmycutebaby

    Answer by luvmycutebaby at 5:13 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • i would tell her it should be at your time table because you are going up and beyond to make sure she can see her kids they are the ones I would feel sorry for not her. She is lucky she has you to even keep this. GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 5:14 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • She deff should pay for gas. If she can pay for her drugs then she can pay for her kids to come and see her!!! She should see her kids when it is cionvienent for you. I know you love your nephews but u MUST think about your marriage!! You need time with your husband and who gives a damn about her boyfriend. If she wants to see her kids and prove herself to her kids she needs to do whatever necessary to see them!!
    tinkerbell319

    Answer by tinkerbell319 at 5:17 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • I think you should stick to your Saturdays only, but for the gas money - yes, she should pay you. If she doesn't pay it is up to you how to proceed. Personally I would still do it because you love your nephews, but you'd certainly be within your rights to refuse if she doesn't pay for gas. You can always make sure you are on E when you pick her up and say I need you to put the gas in my car or we can't go. You're right - she did this to herself and she is darn lucky to have you! Your nephews, too. Sounds like they've been through a lot.
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 5:18 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • I'd say take the day she get's or don't get them at all. As for gas, I doubt you'll get lucky there either way (if you decide to let her win sunday or not).
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 5:20 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • She should take the day she gets and be grateful she's even allowed to see her children. If time with her boyfriend is more important than her children, she deserves to not have them.
    MomMom23

    Answer by MomMom23 at 5:22 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • I would sit her down and tell her your demand. If she can't go bu
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 5:27 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Sorry , I would tell her your demand if she can't except them then stuff.
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 5:29 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • she cannot be picky about the day she gets. if she wants to see her kids she would make every effort to see them when she can. You have to do what is best for you and i say the kids too because they are family. what happens when she says sundays are no longer good? She need to make the effort. she lost her kids and she needs to prove to them and everyone else that she is going to make the effort to be a good mom. screw what she wants, she is selfish and her kids are paying the price. Tell her, you are going to get your nephews on saturday and she needs to make the effort to come see them and tell her stop spending her gas money on drugs and pay to see her sons. its one day a week, how selfish of her. if she doesn't make the effort i am sure the boys will be fine with their dads. a lot of single dads are great dads.. who needs a selfish druggy mom in their life who doesn't try.
    TaiM

    Answer by TaiM at 7:29 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

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