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2 Bumps

My DD bio father is in prison, she wants to meet him.. should I take her????

My dd is 12yrs old, she's never met her bio father.. We told her about him a year ago.. She writes and talks to him on the phone... I don't know what to do?? He 's married and I heard his now wife doesn't want my dd or me to go see him.... He has two other daughters with her and she doesn't want them to meet either....
Me and him were never married... I was 15 and he was 17 when I had my dd...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:36 PM on Jun. 26, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (17)
  • I would take her, but make sure you stay with her the whole time. I would not push the her meeting her half sisters at this point. One visit will let her decide if she wants to know him more.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 7:38 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Depends on why he is in prison if you should take her. But I dont think that his wife should have a say in whether or not your daughter meets her dad.

    Answer by Decker at 7:39 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Ditto with the first post. I wouldn't care what his wife wanted she is his daughter too.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 7:40 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Do you know how long he is in prison? IMO prison is not a place for someone that young, even if it is just visiting. If he is getting out soon I would say wait until then for them to meet.

    Answer by krystie-tina at 7:41 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • she's at an age where she's old enough... also it's not up to his wife as far as your dd visiting him, it's up to him as he will have to put on the visitors list. just be with her and prepared to answer questions that may come up.

    Answer by bonn777 at 7:42 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • As long as he isn't in for some type of child crime then I would say yes, let her meet him.

    Answer by JeremysMom at 7:43 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Does he want her to come? Will they be a part of each others lives when he is released? Will he be released anytime soon? Have you had any contact with him yourself? These are all things I think you should consider in making your decision.

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 7:46 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Make sure you don't go when she's there but yeah if she wants to go then take her

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:51 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • Why is he in prison? If it is for rape/child molesation, no way! I am sorry his new wife wants to pretend your DD isn't a fact, but she is,, My DH's bio dad was in and out of jail for most of his life,, his mother never took him to visit him (he stole cars, bad checks etc,,,,) he actually is NOW thankful she didn't, he was a bad guy,, and SHE knew it,, I guess I wouldn't, reason being,, he could romanticize why he is there. She needs to focus on being a teen, not her dad,, and it sounds like you have provided a great life for her,, let her write to him and talk on the phone,, depending on how long he will be there, she can visit him when she is a bit older, you don't want her to go through the trauma, of pat downs,, other inmates oggling her etc,,, I say NO WAY mom!

    Answer by kimigogo at 8:04 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

  • I agree with the first poster too unless his crime has something to do with children.

    Answer by Christine0813 at 8:10 PM on Jun. 26, 2010

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