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what should i do???

Ok so my dh has been really really pissy for like the last 2 months...won't tell me whats going on says "everything is fine...i am not acting any different"
So we were hanging out with his friends last night and I was outside smoking with a couple of them of they started telling me that they think he has been acting pretty pissy...so what do i do ? I have tried talking to him about it before and nothing happens...should i tell him that even his friends feel that way or would that be wrong? Should i leave his friends out of it? Its really pissing me off and he needs to change his behavior NOW I do not need to be taking care of him like he is a child ya know?

Answer Question
 
momofone072506

Asked by momofone072506 at 3:59 AM on Jun. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (1,796 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Is he having some kind of extra stress at work? Or maybe unemployed right now? There is something going on, you just need to approach him the right way to get him to open up about it. (Yeah, that's the hard part, I know!) I probably wouldn't mention his friends' comments. he may feel like he's being ganged up on and will be even less willing to talk. Good luck!
    LittleWeloosMom

    Answer by LittleWeloosMom at 4:05 AM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • He has a job...a stressful job but he has had the same job for 6 years and he really likes it so i don't know...any ideas on HOW to approach him?

    momofone072506

    Comment by momofone072506 (original poster) at 4:10 AM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • any chance he is not being faithful? i dont want to plant that nasty weed anywhere, but maybe he feels like he can not tell them because they wouldn't approve. What about any trips to the dr lately? Does his health seem any different could he be depressed or bi-polar?
    1nglmom3

    Answer by 1nglmom3 at 4:36 AM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • are you guys having any major stresses? healthy? money? job security? etc? men tend to show anger and pissyness as a screen to hide worry and fear.
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 5:00 AM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • Maybe you could try saying something to him like, you've really seemed like you've been under a lot of stress lately, I love you and I'm worried about you - is there anything I can do to help? That way, it's more like, ok, you can talk to me about it (which should hopefully help with the problem...), as opposed to the whole "you've been acting like a brat, knock it off" (even if he is, and he needs to knock it off...)

    As far as his friends go, I don't think I would bring them into it, or say anything to him about what they said, because that's just going to make them and him all mad at you. However, I don't think there's anything wrong with saying, next time it comes up (with the friends), you know, I've been worried, too, but I don't think he wants to talk to me about it. I don't know... Maybe it's a guy thing - maybe you could talk to him..." - see if he will open up to them.

    gl!
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 7:00 AM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • Oh, if, after you've tried everything else, and it keeps up for longer than, say, a few weeks, without him talking to you about it or doing anything to fix it, then you could try calling him on it - in a non argumentative way.

    When he starts to get nasty with you - just look at him calmly and say "You know, I understand that there's something going on that's bothering you, and I've tried to talk to you about it and be supportive of you through it. But, since you obviously don't want to talk about it, and you don't seem to want to do anything about it, I'm not going to be your whipping boy. So, when you can talk to me in a pleasant way, then we'll finish discussing ___ / doing _____ (or whatever it is that's going on when he gets nasty). Then, walk away and refuse to fight with him about it / ignore him until he's not being so nasty.

    But, this is a last resort sort of thing - I would try the other stuff first.
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 7:04 AM on Jun. 27, 2010

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