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normal for a four year old??

You have to tell him like more than five times no for him to finally understand? He can't play by himself, he's always depending on you for fun? He cries to get his way?

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:54 PM on Jun. 27, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (9)
  • (hugs) yep normal...hang in there mom.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 10:55 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • sounds like my 4 year old! LOL

    I've been telling no he cannot have a laptop about 30 times a day for about 3 months now. 5 times in less than 5 minutes "NO you cannot go play outside in the rain" etc.

    Answer by DarkFaery131 at 10:55 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • if he didn't act like that I would be worried.

    Answer by MomOfDagJag at 10:58 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • For the other answers, I'm guessing I should start worrying about my little one.

    Answer by PhoenixFire at 10:59 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • It's not that you have to tell him "No" multiple times for him to understand. It's that you have to tell him "No" multiple times before he'll listen to you. There is a big difference. He's at that stage where he bridges toddler to kid, and he's going to test you like there's no tomorrow. You're going to want to hit your head against a wall, but he will need to learn. So be prepared.

    Also, some children find that crying gets them whatever they want. It is very normal for children to do that. However, the important thing is that you don't buy into it and you don't give into it. Let him know that if he wants something he needs to ask for it, otherwise he's not getting it. If he throws a tantrum put him in time out.

    Some children also don't like playing alone. Encourage it, but don't enforce it. It is great to ineract with your kids, but it is healthy for them to play alone as well. Stick to it!

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:19 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • My son acts the same way; he has even gotten into throwing tantrums thing. Hold in there!

    Answer by saysha100687 at 11:25 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • Keep in mind that preschoolers still lack the cognitive development to master impulse control. They're getting better- much better than when they were toddlers - but they still have a ways to go. He may *understand* but that doesn't mean he can resist the urge to do what he's fascinated by anyway. Be consistant. This is a very normal stage and the only way to work through it is to stick to your guns and be firm. Be careful that you're not giving too many chances. My kids get one rule reminder because sometimes we all need a reminder. That reminder comes with a warning. "No. DO not run in the house. If you keep running then you'll have to take a 15 minute time out." We follow through. If they know they can get away with 5 'reminders', they'll take them.

    As for playing alone, try challenging him. "Can you build me a house with the legos?" or "I'm going to start dinner. Can you sit at the table and work on a picture for me?"

    Answer by ldmrmom at 11:47 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • The other thing I wanted to add (but ran out of space, LOL!), yes, you need a break. You need to use the bathroom without an audience or cook, or just breathe. Get that. However, and I promise this is true, there *is* going to be a time very soon where you'll miss the moments when you were the center of his world. This needy, pay me attention all the time, phase is relatively short lived. It does not feel like that when you're in the middle of it - but it is. My son was very much about being entertained and played *with* vs independently, even with a little sister to help hold his attention. He turns 8 this week. More and more lately we're given the "Mom! Please. Give me a little space." type look and comments. There are days, as he's walking up the main drive to school telling me to get out of sight up the block before anyone sees me standing there (ha!) that I miss the days he wanted to walk holdign hands and cuddling.

    Answer by ldmrmom at 11:52 PM on Jun. 27, 2010

  • I found that My Child Won't Listen and other early childhood problems by Linda Griffin has great advice for dealing with a four-year-old.

    Answer by slpamy at 9:16 AM on Jun. 28, 2010

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