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Is my 14 month old a "bully"? How should I handle this??

She has started pinching and thinking about biting! Me, her sister and this morning a 6 year old at her in home daycare. She has not learned this behavior at the sitter's house, I do not want the kid that other kids do not want to play with!
She also snatches toys from much older kids and makes them cry.

Is this just her trying to express her wants? She only does this when she is frustrated.
What do I do to correct this behavior?

Answer Question

Asked by chefronswife at 12:22 PM on Jun. 28, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 15 (2,045 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • just tell her in a firm voice - "no bite" or "no hit". since she's probably not talking much, she is trying to show her emotions. it's totally normal. just be consistent with her and she will be out of this phase soon. my son did the same things when he was her age. just hang in there!

    Answer by MommyToEthan at 12:27 PM on Jun. 28, 2010

  • when you find it out let me know lol. I have tried every disipline possible I can think of my DD is the same way , but she is 2.5 this has been going on for months now. It is annoying me when I disipline and it doesn't work

    Answer by mommy5409 at 12:28 PM on Jun. 28, 2010

  • Toddlers aren't developmentally ready for group care. If you can't avoid group care then biting is a behavior you can expect. At home keep your eye on her and be ready to prevent the bites. Redirect her behavior. Do not yell, give mini-lectures, bite, hit, give time-outs, or other punishments. Remember this is a normal behavior. It's not your child's fault she is being put in day care.

    Teaching her some signs may help her express herself. I have a 21 mo grandson and just knowing more and drink helped a lot at that age. He uses the drink sign for both drink and eat. Love & Limits by Elizabeth Crary is a great first toddler discipline book.


    Answer by Gailll at 12:30 PM on Jun. 28, 2010

  • lol oh my gosh! My daughter was a biter at a year old too. she got most of her teeth by then and I think she honestly didn't know any other way of expressing herself... plus her mouth hurt, you know? at this age, there is no yelling or lecturing them at all. her daycare provider will need to 'shadow' her and learn to prevent the behavior. this will mean redirection. she will also need to understand that your baby is still a baby and it's her JOB as the care provider to help prevent and teach. also, children really don't understand sharing at this age. they see something they want and they take it. they don't understand, 'his', 'hers' or 'taking turns'. and despite how it may look, they're not doing it to make the other kid cry.
    when at home, remember to be positive and not downhearted. she'll learn from her surroundings.
    xoxo! good luck!

    Answer by MayMommaToBe at 3:07 PM on Jun. 28, 2010

  • Redirection. When she gets frustrated enough to hit or bite, her attention needs to be directed elsewhere. My 23 month old hits on occasion if I haven't redirected her attention elsewhere, and I will hold her hands (lightly, no grabbing or squeezing) and tell her she needs to give "nice touches" and then she'll give a hug instead. I started this when she was around your DD's age. She would hit, and I would tell her to give "nice touches" and SHOW her either giving hugs, or lightly rubbing her hand on my arm, or her sisters...depending on who she hit. I was VERY consistent with this, and it's worked. You can't prevent it all the time, but when you have a good consistent way to teach them better, it happens FAR LESS than it should.

    Answer by milfalicious08 at 3:22 PM on Jun. 28, 2010

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