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2 Bumps

Question about friend separating from hubby

Wow, a very close friend of mine at work came and told me she and her husband decided to separate over this past weekend. She just wants to cry, but we are too busy at work to let that happen. She has 1 child, who is 5 and going to start kindergarten. She is planning to move back in with her mom, change her dd's school district and start all over with registration in a new town. I'm so sad for her, because I've lived through it myself. My ex- wanted to have nothing to do with my son, but at least her husband (of 10 years) says he'll move closer to them as soon as he can sell their home, so he can see his daughter frequently.

Any words of advice at all? Especially handling it at work?
Thanks.

 
kjrn79

Asked by kjrn79 at 2:25 PM on Jun. 29, 2010 in Relationships

Level 22 (14,066 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • The ladies I work with should answer this, they have been beyond amazing with me through my divorce. If they see I am upset they talk to me, if I need to cry they let me. They were always supportive no matter what I did, even when I went back to try to work things out. Let her lead the way and let her know that you are there for her no matter what.
    kimbob2284

    Answer by kimbob2284 at 5:50 PM on Jun. 29, 2010

  • Just be there for her.
    I'm currently separated and going through a divorce.
    Sometimes I'm fine, sometimes I need to bitch, sometimes I need to cry.

    At work, don't bring it up. If she wants to talk about it, she can bring it up. You'll never know if she's on the verge of breaking down or if she's keeping it all together because the feelings come in waves.
    In your free time ask her how she's doing.
    Let her know that if she needs to vent or cry or just hang out and be "normal" that you're there for her.

    Support, support, support.
    Laila-May

    Answer by Laila-May at 2:28 PM on Jun. 29, 2010

  • When I separated/divorced from my husband there were no children involved. I know the busier I kept myself (especially at work) less time I had to think about it. When I felt myself starting to tear up I would take my break and go for a brisk walk paying attention to my surroundings as a distraction. The busier I was the less I thought about it. It really did help.
    Cheryl4424

    Answer by Cheryl4424 at 2:32 PM on Jun. 29, 2010

  • just give her an ear to vent and try to refrain from giving opinions. never speak negative of him because they just might work it out. the hardest times are usually in evening and weekends. include her and the kids in your activities. dont make her feel like a 3rd wheel. also allow her private time when she needs it. shes mourning and everyone handles it different.
    lillie70

    Answer by lillie70 at 4:14 PM on Jun. 29, 2010

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