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leave or try to work thing out?

I m a resident in the usa, i ve been here 1year and 3months ago,married and have a 6 months old babythe relationship w/ my Dh is down i can t stand him anymore and he feels the same whenever we fight i ask him to send to my home country and he doesnt mind but then i see this little creature and think abt his future w/ 2 seperate parents un 2 different countries and i say to myself that i m the one who has to sacrifice for her baby.i m very stressed out,hate myself, i m not the happy girl that i was, i feel that i m 50 years old(ijust turned 26 this month).i don t work and i dont have friends nor family over here.i m affraid that when i want to leave i ll have toshare the baby w/ him thing that i can t do this little baby is my life. i don t know how to start having a real independant life from my DH, having my own carrier so when it s time i can support myself and my son.helllllp.i m really lost.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:54 AM on Jun. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Don't stay in a relationship because y'all have a child together. Also his money is your money, so if you want to go home for a while, go. take a break from each other that way y'all can see if y'all really want to be together.
    itsallabtthem84

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 11:58 AM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • That's a tough one. If you really that unhappy then you should do what you can to make yourself and your baby happy. He doesn't want to be in the picture anymore then don't force them, makes everything worse. As far as you being in another country and him in another country, I don't think you have to share them unless one travels and if you don't have the money to travel, then they can't do anything about it. I'm not really sure about that though I don't know about that custum with traveling if your seperated. You can find out. Maybe once he knows your serious about leaving he might come around and change his mind. I don't know the whole situation though. I'm sorry your going through this is tough. Good luck to you and that baby.
    Princess7777

    Answer by Princess7777 at 11:59 AM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • Where do you live? If you lived here in GA, i'd hang out with you :~) Why is leaving this country the only option? Can you not file for divorce & get child suport from him? Do you have a permanent visa? Give me more details so that i can help you. My mother is from Argentina & had similar problems with my dad. She never totally left him, she left him for a little while & then they got back together. But, she was here...alone & didn't speak that great english & never had any friends. What country are you from? And how did you meet your husband?.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 12:00 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • j
    Imane1215

    Answer by Imane1215 at 12:08 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • Go home. Yo have family and friends there, they will help you and your son will have a happy Momma. DO NOT stay together for your son. He would rather his parents BOTH be happy , even in different countries, then have them together and unhappy. Good luck.
    NoahsMomma418

    Answer by NoahsMomma418 at 12:09 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • There are periods in every marriage when spouses don't really like each other very much. There are many answers other than divorce to making things better. There are also many ways to make friends for yourself. One thing that will always put stress on a marriage and make for fights is when one spouse places all the reponsibilities for happiness on the other spouse. We can all learn to be happy with out lives without leaving our marriages. The only exception would be if you or your baby are being dangerously abused. Rather than trying to change her husband, a wife should always be concerned with how she can change herself, what she can do right where she is to make her life more enjoyable and more rewarding. Take your baby to a local park, watch out for other young moms, start a conversation, make a friend that you can do other things with. Love your husband even when you find him unlovable. None of us is sweet all the time!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:10 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • Go see your doctor. It sounds like you might have postpartum depression. Find out if you do. Get on medication and see what happens afterwards. Depression is very common after childbirth and it can last for years. So please rule that out first before you making life altering decisions.

    isabellalecour

    Answer by isabellalecour at 12:11 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

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