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6 Bumps

What happened to working on a relationship together?

Ppl are so fast to jump to DIVORCE! or BREAKING UP!

what happened to sticking together through think or thin hard times and good times for richer or poorer? even if you arent married??

Answer Question
 
MomNbabyGirl009

Asked by MomNbabyGirl009 at 1:05 PM on Jun. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 20 (9,279 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • We live in a disposable society where even emotions and people are replaceable.
    Aqua_Jen

    Answer by Aqua_Jen at 1:07 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • If they can't stick through the hard times together, then they shouldn't be together. Thats part of what marriage is about. Seriously, if they give up so quickly, then they werent meant to be married to each other. I would never give up so easily on my DH, we work though thick & thin because we have lots of love & respect for each other.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 1:10 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • In part I suspect it is because sometimes people rush into it. They go out on a date or two, hop into bed, and they make a connection that is sometimes assumed to be love but really may be sexual attraction. When the reality of every day life hits and the mate is no longer only seen in the very best of circumstances- relaxed, made up, freshly showered, shaved, on very best behavior- then the couple wonders what else is out there. Longer periods of courtship without sexual intercourse, long engagements, these might help people see the real person they are with.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 1:12 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • Attitudes have changed when it comes to marriage and to everything else. When I was a newly wed, marriage was all about making the other person happy. The result was that people were actually happy, because happiness is achieved when one is not all the time thinking about herself and what makes her happy. Nowdays, it's all about me and what you can do to make me happy. And so, everybody is looking for happiness and nobody is finding it because they are looking in all the wrong places. The answer to happiness in marriage or anywhere else, for that matter, is giving of yourself for the good of someone else. As long as all of life revolves around yourself, one is destined to a life of misery. Unfortunately, since this is not known, we divorce our mates, look for and find another one, and then repeat the cycle. My husband and I have been married for more than 45 years. We've had our ups and downs, but we are committed.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:13 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • I love your answer NannyB! My mom always tell me the same sort of thing.
    MommyH2

    Answer by MommyH2 at 1:17 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • It's all about attitudes, communication, selflessness, dicipline, commitment and time. If you don't have or aren't willing to give any of these to the other person, then it will never work.
    CAGirl4

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 1:18 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • If they're so quick to give up and throw in the towel, my guess is that they're never really going to find someone who makes them happy and keeps them content. Doesn't matter how much two people love each other, there are going to be arguments and disagreements. There are going to be hurt feelings, and times where one or the other says something hurtful out of anger and takes it back. Being strong and committed to your SO helps you through these times. Marriage has become somewhat of a fairy tale, and by no means is it. It's rough sometimes, and people fail to realize that before they take their vows. They think their love is infallible...that they'll ALWAYS be happy go lucky and never fall upon hard times. My DH and I have had plenty of rough times, angry words shared, fights, disagreements, but we're committed to our marriage. We're both very forgiving under proper circumstances. We'd never give up on one another.
    milfalicious08

    Answer by milfalicious08 at 1:19 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • Be cause people have no back bone and they listen to other people advise. Which is usually LEAVE HIM you deserve better. It is easier to tell someone to get out, then to stay and work things out.
    Claudiomom

    Answer by Claudiomom at 1:21 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • Because people don't get to know one another. Eventually that mushy feeling and the whole physical attraction settles down and then the real person is revealed. I think if people werent in such a hurry the divorce rate would be half what it is today. After the bells and whistles die down, that is when you see the person for who they are and that is when you can decide if this person is for you.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 3:38 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • NannyB nailed it. She's totally right.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 6:01 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

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