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Can anyone explain this to me?

Why is it so difficult for a man to simply tell a woman that they aren't into them? I was seeing this guy and it was going good for about two weeks, then out of the blue, literally nothing changed, he just quit calling, texting, or coming over. I've known him for about 7 months and we were friends before anything romantic happend between us, but I just can't understand it, so I flat out asked him what was going on and he jumped around it saying he was busy and blah blah blah. Now, I'm not stupid, I know where it's going, he's lost interest but it just BURNS me up that he didnt' have the guts to just say so! He knows me and knows how I was hurt in the past by this exact same situation where I was left in the dark, and he knows I wouldn't have freaked out or gotten mad, I would have totally understood, and I would have had the respect for him to tell him if I wasn't's just SO frustrating!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Jun. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I think most men just think that if they leave you alone that you will get the message.

    Answer by Decker at 2:22 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • OMG, that happened to me about a thousand times before I found a guy worth my time. My bestie always called them my vanishing boyfriends. he said she thinks I had a boyfriend, but, now we aren't so sure it actually happened. LOL

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 2:22 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • for the same reason it's hard for women to say "i'm just not that interested in you"

    Answer by jennifer588 at 2:22 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • It is frustrating. The other person doesn't want a scene or recriminations. The easy way out for him is to just walk away. It's OK to discover when starting dating that you don't like someone that much, but a person should tell them that the relationship isn't what they were looking for. If you say it that way, that the relationship is at fault, it helps the rejected person save a bit of face anyway. I'm sorry this happened to you.

    Answer by Bmat at 2:24 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • I must be different then, because I have no problem in telling someone I'm not interested in them romantically, i would rather do that as opposed to hurting someone's feelings in the long run. He sounds like jerk, IMO. I mean do it in a nice way, there's always nice ways to go about things, but I think a man would rather physically move to a different state than own up to you not being "the one", Is it immature? Yes, but that's just the way it is I guess. Hang in there, you'll find someone worth your time, and if this guy was a "friend" in the first place he would never do you this way, because like you said, he knew you had been hurt before by someone in the same way, cut him loose and count your blessings! Good luck, and do not settle!

    Answer by jillisue808 at 2:27 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • That is how I figure out guys where finished with me. I guess guys have not changed in the past 20 some years. They are still playing that trick on women.

    Answer by louise2 at 2:30 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • IMO
    men are programed to pursue
    so when they no longer want to pursue, they are at a total lost as what to do

    women can use words like breathing,
    men have to really try to think of words, then process them, go to a cave to think some more and then maybe they come out of cave to grunt

    Answer by fiatpax at 2:33 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • idk but the same goes with women too. check out this section and see how many women are not interested in their man anymore and instead of trying to fix it or leave, they go off looking at another man.

    Answer by 3xangel at 3:16 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • It is frustrating but I was told by several male friends that they just believe it is easier. i told them they are idiots :)

    Answer by SebbiesMommy at 11:06 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

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