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Which is better - nursing home or living at home alone when you can't take care of yourself?

If you were living alone in your old age and really unable to take care of yourself adequately, with no relatives available to take on the role of caregiver, do you think you would resist moving to a nursing home or assisted living facility?

I ask the question because I had an aunt who was in and out of the hospital but they kept releasing her to home, even though the family told them that sending her home was a death sentence. She had stopped eating and kept falling down. If she'd gone to a rehab facility (which she considered a nursing home, therefore it was to be avoided), she might still be alive today. She did not get help recovering from an injury, so the problem escalated and she passed away recently.

I realize that none of us can know how we would react until we are in the situation. For me, if I was alone, I think I might enjoy having some people my own age to interact with.


Asked by Iamgr8teful at 10:46 PM on Jun. 30, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 25 (23,279 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • I think it's a matter of dignity when people reach that point. When you think about it, you have taken care of yourself for so long, and gradually you age and then it probably seems that all of a sudden you can't do things you used to do without a thought. I know it's TMI, but sometimes they are not as limber and they can't wipe themselves, some become incontinent and soil themselves. After raising kids and living your adult life for so long, it has to be hard to accept that you have to wear adult diapers, or have people help you with things you think are mundane.

    I think for companionship a nursing home would be good, but I don't even like to think of feeling like I am giving up my pride. I hope when I reach that age I am not so full of pride that I won't accept help if I need it.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 10:52 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • When I'm to the point of not being able to really take care of my self and it's between a nursing home or staying alone.. I'll choose to stay alone.. I can't at least end things my own self on my own terms!

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 10:49 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • I've worked as a home health aide for almost 2years and I currently work in a nursing hom (have for the past 3 years). It all depends on what you need help with. If you need help with showering and cleaning your house, making meals...ect..then a home health aide would be best. If you can't even toilet yourself and can't remember to take your insulin or medicine then you should be in a nursing home where the nurse can give you your meds in a timely manner. It all depend on the situation you are in.

    While the nursing home I work at is good...I'd personally rather have a home health aide because I wanna pass away at home but if I end up in a nursing home then I'd do fine in that to. I just would rather be home.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 10:51 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • i'd rather pass at home. i'm a very private person and not all that social. i would never want to be in a home. i would get a home health nurse, but i dont ever want to be in a home. and i would never put my mom there. when she gets older i will let her come live with us if she wants to.

    Answer by jennifer588 at 11:00 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • It's too bad adult protective services wasn't involved. It would have forced her to be in a nursing home if family couldn't take care of her. At least she would have a having clean clothes; baths; clean bed; meals for her; her medication; and shelter. Sorry this happened to your aunt.

    Answer by musicmom08 at 10:54 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • There are two ways to answer this question. The first being if I were making the decision for a relative, or otherwise, I would say of course, Nursing Home. They will have their needs taken care of and I would not have to worry about what you have described. However, thinking of myself, I definitely would say I would want to be at home. I think all of us would have this way of thinking, because no one wants to go to a nursing home. It's the thought of losing our freedom, our independence. It's something we can't fathom.

    Answer by m-avi at 11:00 PM on Jun. 30, 2010

  • I would go to a home for sure!

    Answer by beckie66 at 10:49 PM on Jun. 30, 2010