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3 Bumps

Why is he calling so late?

This question is to all the moms who have a child with an ex and are currently in a new relationship. If your ex is apart of your childs life do they have a time limit on when they can call and talk to their child on the phone? My daughters father just called for her and it is 11pm, it's summer so I let my daugher stay up so she is awake to talk to him. Instead I just a phone throwned at me and my current bf asking why is he calling here so late, he apparently thinks we have something going on but we dont at all. He said that he is not allowed to call after 10pm. I have never gave my ex a time limit, if he wants to talk to her and she's up than why not, am I wrong for this?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:08 AM on Jul. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • your bf has a point. it's disrespectful to him BUT if he's not a serious bf it shouldn't really matter!
    mrsary

    Answer by mrsary at 3:12 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • Well.. first off..o_O He threw a phone at you?? Really??...wow
    Second.. yes, he should have all the time he wants and needs with his child.
    BUT.... you and him need to sit down and have parent to parent talk with each other. She is in YOUR house and he needs to respect the family in general, that includes everyone else in the house he may be disturbing calling at 11pm. Try to see if you two can meet in the middle somewhere about calling hours during the week days maybe.
    I hope you figure out a good balance imho
    ..... and not to be too rude but no one should ever have anything thrown at themselves for anything.. not even an accusations of cheating.. I hope your bf doesn't do it again.
    midnight11287

    Answer by midnight11287 at 3:18 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • You know i have to say you have a point. Does your BF have trust issues? I would explain to him that if your child's father calls and the child is up then he has every right to speak with your child if your child isn't up then you would tell him that she is asleep. Who's home is it? Yours, his or both of yours?
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 3:19 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I agree with minight11287
    jojolicious220

    Answer by jojolicious220 at 3:20 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I don't see how it is disrespectful to him at all. Your ex is calling to talk to his daughter, not you. Tell bf if he is in it for the long haul to get over his insecurities, you have a child with another man and he will be a part of your guys life until your daughter is at least 18.
    GavinsMommii

    Answer by GavinsMommii at 3:22 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • He threw a phone at you? Is this really a mature way to handle things? My father called at midnight to talk to me (normally he was drunk and that is why it was late) my step dad never would have gotten mad, he did tell him to call back in the morning if i was asleep. If you ex knows your daughter is up and calls then I dont see the issue. Why is your BF so insecure? You BF does realize that your Ex will always be in your life right? getting all worked up wont change anything, he needs to usderstand that being in a relationship with someone who has a child from a previous relationship means you have a Ex who will be in your life forever, he isnt going to go away.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 3:32 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • You're boyfriend sounds like a jerk. The biggest issue here is that he doesn't trust you. RED FLAG! Why is he with you if he doesn't trust you? It's disrespectful to him? I think not. Unless it's his house, he's only a boyfriend and can't make those kinds of demands. And finally, you're little girl's daddy should be able to talk to her whenever he wants and it's reasonable for her. Your BFs behavior is a really good way to start some serious triangle strife that you DON"T want to live with forever!
    Adelicious

    Answer by Adelicious at 4:39 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • He wasn't calling to speak with you though. I think if this is how you've always done things with the ex I would not disrupt things.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 5:41 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • 11pm is late to be calling anyone... i don't see it as disrespectful towards your boyfriend and that should be something you two need to discuss.. although, if he's throwing phones at you you might want to rethink the whole relationship...
    TomsMom

    Answer by TomsMom at 6:46 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I'm kind of on both sides on this one. If your daughter is up and he knows it, then I don't see what the problem is unless other people in the house are asleep. But perhaps it would be better to add your daughter on your cell plan or something so that it doesn't disrupt anyone else in the house, or a phone in her room but cell is cheaper).
    A lot of people seem to think that you can only cheat at night or something, which is why they get so pissy at the late night outings and phone calls... lol
    My problem is, your boyfriend thinking you're cheating because of the phone call. Another thing is you said "current bf". Doesn't sound serious when worded like that. If he lives there, then you have to work together to have less problems... maybe put an extention in your daughters room and keep the others on silent at night? No one is going to be throwing a phone at me tho... that's not going to happen more than once for me.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 7:08 AM on Jul. 1, 2010

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