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Did anyone else have their last child, first?

You know the parents that you talk to who say "OH man, if he/she was our first, they would have been our last" well.. we planned on having 2 but he's well.. meant to be an only child apparently. lol!! but I do feel guilty that he won't have a sibling now.... how do you get past those feelings or don't you ? and you ended up just having the one child??? I just think maybe I thought I could handle being a mother better than I am doing.. granted he's strong willed and making me work for my title of Mom!! I think I had my Last child, first...

 
maxsmom11807

Asked by maxsmom11807 at 5:00 PM on Jul. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 29 (40,703 Credits)
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Answers (7)
  • I did! Get either one of these books: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0761521364/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_2?pf_rd_p=486539851&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0842336222&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=1NZM8GZCE5102XRVR5MR

    or this one, depending on what you've got: http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Your-Spirited-Child-Rev/dp/0060739665/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1278018338&sr=1-1

    I had the first one, he is still very strong willed, in fact I just got through arguing with him. (me thinks me needs to re-read the book!)
    I was brave, and had another child. She is sort of a combo, but milder and easier in someways, harder in others.

    However: there will be NO more for me, unless the universe wills it.
    Saya

    Answer by Saya at 5:08 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • oh yes
    but i had only one, two older step kids
    my child is more than one mom needs to handle
    not having more because of age, but if i was younger i would be stopping because of your reason
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 5:04 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • how old is he?

    our son will be 2 in Nov (19 months), and there are days I question myself...lol, "and you want MORE of these??!!" lmao

    but, I know kids are just challenging, period. I worry if I'm making the right choices/decisions...if I'm raising him right. I want him to grow up to be a respectable, kind and polite young man.....my fear is that won't happen, because of the way I chose to raise him.
    but, that aside, I know I wouldn't be happy with just one child--that's how I know I'm meant for more. and I think we'll know if and when we're done having children.

    if you think you and your family will be happy with just the one child, that's up to you.
    but I think age can play a roll..especially in boys. boys are just ornery. it's their nature. :)
    carliemarie1015

    Answer by carliemarie1015 at 5:06 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • My middle one needed to be an only child because he really needs a lot of attention, but he's a twin. My oldest wants to be an only child, but too bad for her she's a twin too. To really get them both we gave them a younger sister.
    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 5:08 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • Yep my first will be my last due to medical problems I have. It has taken me months of tears and months of angry and months of trying to get to a point where I am ok with this. And I have days when it doesn't bother me and days when my heart breaks for all the children I am not going to have.
    LovinKayla

    Answer by LovinKayla at 5:10 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • Saya - Thank you - I actually have both of those books already lol... sadly, I have only started the second one and made it 1/4 way through - he also isn't sleeping through the night anymore- waking up to 6 times so that means I have to go to bed when he does so it limits my time I used to have to read or have my time for things right now..but thank you very much!!
    He is 2-1/2.. we new the day we brought him home I think that he'd be an only.. his colic alone was enough to handle the first six months, however that wasn't even close to the list of reasons he's my only - which is also a good thing.. he needs SO much attention but this way, he's also getting all the attention he requires without having to be pushed aside, some days I feel lucky he was my last, first!! I don't know how other mothers do it otherwise, but I give you all credit for it!!
    maxsmom11807

    Comment by maxsmom11807 (original poster) at 5:13 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • You are way to hard on yourself. I think you're a fabulous mother!!!!
    He's definitely making you work for it, but you're doing a great job!!!!
    mrsderekjeter

    Answer by mrsderekjeter at 2:38 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

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