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14 Bumps

Second day with no word... How do you NOT worry??

SO is in the airforce. Deployed to Iraq right now and this is the second day I have not had word from him. Im getting worried. I guess I was spoiled because we could talk every night and the slightest throw off of that makes me worry.
Then one night he came on and didnt say anything to me for 15minutes until i said hi to him. He is acting so strange. How do I brush this off and get through the days without thinking he is mad at me or freaking out when i dont hear from him.

He has been gone a month and this is my first deployment. What do i do to get through this?

I dont want to show him Im upset, I write him like nothings wrong, but still let him know how home is. I just dont know how to get over these feelings.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:57 PM on Jul. 1, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • It is hard not to worry a lot while they are deployed. More than likely his mind was still on his days work when he was talking to you. They pretty much stay busy while in Iraq. If this is HIS first deployment there is some adjustment at first, it is a war zone. They are very well trained BUT like my DH says they train, train and train some more but actually BEING there is different. If he works with the medical like my DH does it is a shock. And if he goes out with on the choppers to remote FOB's like mine does that is another shock. He will be fine, he is just really getting used to putting all of his training to another use. I can say don't worry but we ALL worry, its just later you will learn to carry on the way we all do. Get in touch with the other Moms at your base who are going through the same thing. Get on here any time and chat with us, we are all here for you Mama. He couldn't do this without you. BIG HUGS
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 10:00 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I have walked in your shoes.... My husband was in the Air Force for 20 years and we had many seperations. He never went to war so I can't speak to that but what I can say to you is your feelings are real and it is difficult not to worry and to try and understand what they are going thru. Important for you to get a support system that will be there 24-7. It is good for you to reach out to Moms on CM and get feedback. Try and get in a routine and keep busy and do fun things with your children. I was able to have a group of friends and we got together weekly to go to dinner, fix dinner at each others houses, go to the movies, go to the park.
    I had play dates at my house for my son that was 2 at the time. Nights were the hardest, I talked on the phone alot to friends. Try as hard as you can not to have your days revolve around waiting for his call. If you have a church family, they would be a good support. Bless you!
    Librarylady60

    Answer by Librarylady60 at 8:27 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I agree with Librarylady60.


    Quoting: Important for you to get a support system that will be there 24-7. It is good for you to reach out to Moms on CM and get feedback. Try and get in a routine and keep busy and do fun things with your children. I was able to have a group of friends and we got together weekly to go to dinner, fix dinner at each others houses, go to the movies, go to the park.
    I had play dates at my house for my son that was 2 at the time. Nights were the hardest, I talked on the phone alot to friends. Try as hard as you can not to have your days revolve around waiting for his call. If you have a church family, they would be a good support.

    sokkamum

    Answer by sokkamum at 9:18 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • Not in your shoes so I have no advise but wanted to send hugs ((()))

    Judmr

    Answer by Judmr at 8:01 AM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Just a couple of things that my friend told me when her b/f was in Iraq (2 or 3 times) and from what I remember with my brother being over there.

    Sometimes there is a delay with the internet up to a couple of minutes. So he may not see you are online until you message him. They had the most problems with Skype, FB chat, and MSN messenger.

    They have a lot to get used to over there. They will see and do things that we can't even fathom and can keep the mind occupied. Not too mention they are supposed to keep aware of constant threat so they are never caught off guard.

    I'm sure he's not mad and he misses you like crazy and things will get better once he has had more time to adjust to his new lifestyle.
    *hugs*
    kfroz0415

    Answer by kfroz0415 at 1:12 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I really don't know what you are going through, but here are some hugs for you.
    LoveRed71

    Answer by LoveRed71 at 1:18 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I forgot to add that sometimes they have missions that they are not allowed to tell anyone about so he may not have access to a computer for a couple days and can only tell you why when he gets back... Another sucky part of the Armed Forces.
    kfroz0415

    Answer by kfroz0415 at 1:19 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Dont get yourself worried. Communication may be down right now. If something happened you would have heard something by now. I'm sure he's fine mama.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 2:46 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • My son was in Iraq for 15 mos. and there were weeks when we didn't hear anything. The base he was on wasn't the safest and walking over to the side with phones was dangerous so they rarely got a chance to call home. I worried but I always kept telling myself that no news at all was the best news. If something were wrong, you'd know so if you know nothing at all then that's a good thing.
    tracylynnr67

    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 3:36 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • (((HUGS))))
    tracylynnr67

    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 3:36 PM on Jul. 2, 2010