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so, my son and daughter were trying to play a video game and it wouldn't recognise the contoller so my daughter(16) got all testy and told my son(14) he was a retard and he punched her in the arm so she freaked and my husband sitting nest to him punched him in the arm too- I EFFING HATE when this crap happens. Huuby thinks it's perfectly fine that he did it and he "didn't hit him that hard" but my son was screaming Ow and I said to him "oh YEAH- cause THAT'S how we teach him not to hit" cont...


Asked by charlotsomtimes at 9:19 PM on Jul. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

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Answers (11)
  • I don't want you to think i was picking on you.I just always use the opportunity to spread the word. So many people use the r-word casually that it is almost impossible for your children to not pick it up somewhere.

    It sounds like your husband just reinforced what you were trying to tell the kids NOT to do. How frustrating. I hope everything settles down for you. You will all find things to do at your new place and the kids will make friends. Just hang in there until that happens!

    Answer by LittleWeloosMom at 9:56 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • Honestly, I know you realize this, but you need to work on ways for everyone to control their anger, because this is NOT a healthy environment for the kids for everyone to be hitting each other.

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 9:24 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • Sorry. I hate arguments over silly things like that! I would just try your best to instill that hitting is not okay and stop allowing XBox to be played if it continues.

    Also, and I am not saying this to be judgmental, please let your kids know now that the R-word (retard) is not okay, either. For kids with developmental disabilities (and their families) it i very hurtful. Most people say it without thinking what it really means. Thank you.

    Answer by LittleWeloosMom at 9:30 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I have to say if that was my husband he would have been laid out on the floor, honestly it would be the last time he touched my child like that. Especially over an x-box.

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 10:45 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • and I went and punched him in the shoulder a couple times *not like I even hit hard but anyhow...he got REALLY pissed and said he was sick of us all and then got up and went in the bedroom and slammed the dorr. I KNOW he will not apologise for punching my son and this crap makes me crazy.

    It's not so much a question, more of a vent...
    I know I was in the wrong, but so was he in my opinion

    Comment by charlotsomtimes (original poster) at 9:22 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • damn typos! I can never seem to post anything without them!
    anyhow...the kids have apologised to each other- but hubby will stay in the romm and be pissy all night now. grr

    Comment by charlotsomtimes (original poster) at 9:23 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I know-we have been with each other and NO one else for the last like 3 weeks...we jsut moved to a new state so we are all kinda on each other's nerves, shich doesn't make it OK at all...but it is what it is.
    My husbanc thinks that because HIS dad treated him that way that it's fine to treat our kids that way and I HATE it. He thinks WE have issues and HE doesn't and will Never admit he's wrong. It's very frustrating

    Comment by charlotsomtimes (original poster) at 9:29 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • I know- I told her I do not want her saying stuff like that to anyone EVER. I have told her countless times before too. She is a great kid, but her mouth is ALWAYS what gets her in trouble. She realises that this all went down because she said what she did and was being testy -she was in her room crying too... *sigh* and I was about to take xbox away then hubby hit my son and it all went out of control :(

    Comment by charlotsomtimes (original poster) at 9:37 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • thanks...
    hubby came out- no apology to my son or anyone, and acts like nothing happened
    at least it's over

    Comment by charlotsomtimes (original poster) at 10:04 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

  • well- he punched Nat because Nat punched his sister. The thing that got me was that when he did it he said "You punch her...I punch YOU"
    so when I punched hubby- I said "well, what comes around goes around you punch him-so I punch you...see how that works? It's ok for you to punch him-but NOT for me to punch you?!?!"
    I was trying to make a point- yeah I went about it all wrong but at the moment that was my reaction.

    anyhow...all is calm now...

    Comment by charlotsomtimes (original poster) at 12:42 AM on Jul. 2, 2010