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How do I know if he's drinking TOO much? How do I tell him?

My SO of 6 years recently started drinnking a lot more than he ever had. It's now up to 2 24oz cans of high-alcohol content beer EVERDAY. Then some days it's more or even with hard liquor. He can polish off a bottle of vodka in a day. He hasn't become agressive and doesn't "act drunk" or anything but I'm starting to notice a change in his attitude. He's not as loving as he always was and he seems to put people off more than usual. His friends have noticed and said something and I've told him several times but he doesn't think he's doing anything wrong. How can I help him before it gets worse if he doesn't understand where anyone is coming from?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on Jul. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • My SO started drinking a lot about a year ago and after dealing with it for a few months I finally sat him down and asked him to pick 3 days a week he could drink. He wasn't happy about it, but he understood so he did it and is still doing it.
    allfiller

    Answer by allfiller at 4:09 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Unfortunately, you can't help an alcoholic until THEY want the help and are willing to work to fight their addiction. He will have to decide this is a problem on his own, and decide he wants help. For now, you can tell him how you feel, but it may not do anything to change him. You can go to Al-Anon meetings and hear from others what made them wake up, and hear from other family members how they dealt with the drinking.
    preacherskid

    Answer by preacherskid at 4:11 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I would contine to share my feelings with him in a non-combative way.
    UpSheRises

    Answer by UpSheRises at 4:18 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I would start to ask questions like what are his expectations what is going on and how he sees himself if this trend continues. Honesty and share that your concerned or just share how your day has gone. this is a subject that could be nothing or it could be something say I am concerned about this and can we talk about it. Do not be afraid this is your SO and you share a life you are part of this life with him share this as well. GL Momma

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 4:29 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • agree with pinkdragon36. My husband has been drinking too much lately because he may be facing a lay off.and we have had several talks about it. My father was an alcoholic and we had a very sad situation for many years. he died from it. Good luck!!
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:43 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • If you have to ask, then there is a problem. http://www.alanon.org/

    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:03 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

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