Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

How do you deal w/ ppl that offer you unwanted parenting advice?

We've all had them, whether its the well meaning older women @ the grocery store or the rude person telling us to control our kids. How do you handle the well meaning ones? The ones that are just down right rude & out of place? What if the advice is coming from someone you know vs a stranger?


Asked by Nyx7 at 5:43 PM on Jul. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Level 23 (16,272 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • I usually dress my autistic daughter in a t-shirt that says" pardon me I 'm having a stimmy day ' If she is having a bad day and we need to go out......usually that shuts people up enough....and if they offer an opinion, I ask where they got their phsycology degree in working with autistic children.....I dont put up with rude people anymore!

    Answer by michaux at 10:27 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I've never had someone comment...I just get the "looks" of "why is your child screaming?" To combat the "look" I just don't look at people anymore when my kids are having fits...I just do my thing and stay as calm as possible. If it becomes too much for me to handle, we get our things together and leave.
    I actually had one lady tell me "good for you" when I was putting a toddler restraint on her so she could walk around without running

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 5:46 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I'm more likely to take advice from someone I know or a stranger that I have asked (as on here) than a stranger at the store. And, more likely to take it from a parent who has either had a kid my age, or is really close to kids my age (like other family) rather than someone who doesn't have kids, or just has a little baby and knows nothing about a 5 year old and hasn't ever been around one.

    When I get unwanted advice from someone at a store, I just smile politely and say I'll think about it, or I've heard that before, or something like that. If they just keep pushing and won't let it go, I just tell them I am not interested and to leave me alone.
    If someone is just rude, I'm more likely to tell them to shove their rude, unwanted advice up their ass and leave me alone. Rude gets rude back, if you know what I mean.

    Answer by Kiwismommy19 at 5:47 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I just give them a nod and say well if that's the way you want to discipline your children, then by all means go right ahead. But I do not agree with that and will continue my normal discipline practices. I would then walk off, leaving them unable to continue the conversation.


    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 5:46 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • If I ask for advice, I welcome it but if I don't I ignore it. Smile and nod then turn around and do what you feel is right for your kid.

    Answer by older at 5:47 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I pretty much ignore anyone who has something to say that isnt nice. Or I have been known to say, if it is someone that I actually need to address, like a MIL, or other relative, that we all parent in our own ways. And if that is how I parent, and it works for me, then that is what I will keep doing.

    Answer by dakajazz23 at 5:48 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I always thank them with a smile and go about my business if it's a stranger in public. If it's someone I know, I will let them know that our family is working on ____ and will try their suggestion. I usually won't try their suggestion, but hearing that usually makes them stop, thinking they "won". If they persist, I will tell them that i have to handle things the way that works for my family weather or not they like it because I'm raising my kids and they're not.

    Answer by silversmom at 5:48 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Usually I just let it fly on by if it is a well meaning stranger, I have one overbearing cousin who thinks I should spank my 15 month old and she and I have butted heads over it a few times, my granny gives really good advice being that she is mother to 8, grandmother to 21 and great grandmother to 35 and great-great grandmother to 2 so when she talks I really listen, when it is MIL I usually tell how I am going to do the exact opposite of what she says just to try to get her going.

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 5:51 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • oh and to the well meaning one, I would say something along the same way, but nicer. I basically would treat them with the same respect they treated me.


    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 5:47 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I employ the classic 'smile and knod' unless it is extreme and rude and then I speak my mind bluntly.

    Answer by ethans_momma06 at 5:52 PM on Jul. 2, 2010