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10 Bumps

should i stop my daughter from playing with a kid

ok so im in the kitchen backing stuff for my daughters party and the kids are outside playing in the game room in my building so the girls come in and i noticed 1 girl wasnt there so i asked weres makayla?and my daughter told me they didnt play with her anymore and i asked why and she told me that she wasnt in there club anymore they then went backoutside and my daughter came back in by herself and i asked her why wasnt makayla in there club anymore and she tells me Shayla (one her friends that she plays with)said that there club is only for light skinned girls and makayla is too dark and i told her u dont stop being someones friend because there dark thats not right and she says that Shayla is the captain of the group so thats what goes i then made my daughter apoligize to Makayla for being rude,now im debating if i should stop my daughter from playing with this child,the girls mom just laughed when i told her

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Asked by LABELmeCUTE at 6:25 PM on Jul. 2, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 15 (1,951 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • I wouldn't let her play with Shayla anymore. I don't let my kids behave that way and they don't socialize with kids like that either. How rude!

    Answer by MillyPontipee at 6:28 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I would. It sounds like Shayla is being raised in a home where racism is prominent. I would explain to your daughter that what Shayla does isnt right, nor is it nice. And I would also say something to Shayla's mom along the lines of "I enjoy having your child to my house, but I will not expose my child to intolerance of others."

    Answer by ArmyWifeAshlie at 6:28 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • :( i wouldnt not allow her to play, shes obvoiusly mislead.
    I would just tell the little girl what you told your daughter U dont stop being someones friend because of the color of their skin.

    and hopefully she understands that! i would have the girl apologize to Makayla as well.

    Answer by MomNbabyGirl009 at 6:28 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I would stop her......we are the ones that teach our children how to stand up for themselves and for others, she will learn because of what you teach her. If you let her play with a child like that then she could start to "adopt" those beliefs herself.

    Answer by colethky at 6:29 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I agree that sometimes when you do the RIGHT things, you may lose popularity, but you still have integrity and THAT'S more important. I'd remind your DD that no one gets to choose what color, race, sex, or other characteristics that they have when they are born, that's all in the plan of God (if you believe as I do). I'd also advise DD that if Shayla would turn on Makayla this week for the darkness of her skin, how would she feel if Shayla decided a certain feature about DD is no longer "club-worthy"? I'm sorry that kids have to deal with these things, but we do have to teach them right. Good luck, OP!

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 6:38 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Colethky, I wish I could vote you up twice!

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 6:39 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Let her still be friends, but make sure Shayla overhears you telling your daughter why it's important for everyone to be included. Maybe Shayla needs someone to tell her (not your place to do it directly, i think, not this time anyway) and she's not getting that at home. Your child has the opportunity to teach love and tolerance here!

    Answer by silversmom at 6:41 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I was about to say that you shouldn't let her play with that girl anymore, till I read silversmom's answer...she has a good point

    Answer by MommyH2 at 6:45 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I wasn't sure how to answer your question until I read that the mom laughed when you told her what her daughter said. Wow! I wouldn't let my kid play with her anymore, if the mom thinks that is funny, God knows what she teaches her child.

    Answer by newmomma14 at 7:28 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • I might tell my daughter that I can't allow her to play with mean kids. We work hard to keep our kids from being exposed to racist talk and attitudes. I would be afraid the girl's talk would influence her.

    Answer by Iamgr8teful at 7:34 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

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