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5 Bumps

Am I wrong to be picky about the guys I date?

I've been divorced now for a year and now I am ready to get out there and date. My 3 children are my life and I don't want to bring anyone around that I know they will not like.

Anyway, one day I was out with my cousin and she was telling me that her husbands cousin had seen me before and wanted to get to know me. (Mind you that my cousin and I have totally different taste.) I agreed to go with cousin to meet up with her husband and cousin to satisfy the both of them.

I get there and the cousin is a drug dealer, ignorant, a slob and has a disgusting vocabulary. I refuse to go out with him afterwards and my cousin became really upset with me because I refuse to go out to dinner with him.

I have 3 children. Michael who is 10, Eddie who is 6 and Giana who is 4. I don't want just anyone in front of them and besides, I am finishing school to become a teacher and I don't need that in my life. Am I wrong?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:58 PM on Jul. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • You have a right to be picky and definitely with this guy!

    Answer by MommyH2 at 7:01 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • If you meet him and he's a slob with disgusting vocabulary, that is not 'being picky'. Now, if you don't go out with a guy because he has the wrong color eyes, or he smiles wierd, or he drives a volvo--that is being picky. Please so not let this family member bully you into dating people by saying you are being picky.

    Answer by layh41407 at 7:02 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • You have a responsibility to be picky. A responsibility to your children and yourself. :)

    Answer by Bmat at 7:03 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • You should be picky, especially when children are involved.    And yeah, this guy definitely isn't worthy of your time.


    Answer by beeky at 7:06 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • You have absolutely every right to be picky!!

    There is no reason why you should have to settle with someone you don't want to be with, at least you didnt lead him on. I understand why you wouldn't want your kids around someone like that and if your cousin can't understand that, then too bad! You're the mom and you know what's best for your children, you're protecting them from a drug dealer and someone who would be a bad influence for them, nothing wrong with that mommy!

    Answer by youngmommy21709 at 7:07 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • You are absolutely not wrong. Since you have already been married, you are more sure of what you actually want..... Don't settle! You and your children deserve a good man.

    Answer by SapphireTekGirl at 7:08 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Be picky! Ugh! He sounds miserable! I think your cousin is just as bad and maybe worse for trying to pair you w/someone like that. I hope that you take your time and find someone great for you and your kids. GL

    Answer by momthruivf at 7:09 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Be picky!! You deserve to be HAPPY not to settle for joe-schmoe and you kids deserve the best too. I would NEVER lower myself to the type of person you described, not as friends let alone lovers, yuck!

    Answer by Deathlilly at 7:10 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • No. I feel it is your responsibility to be picky. Particularly for your children's sakes. =)

    Answer by firenicecream at 7:11 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

  • Ignore anyone who tells you different. It is your job, your responsiblilty to protect your kids. I'll go a step further, don't introduce any guy to them that you aren't dating exclusively.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 7:21 PM on Jul. 2, 2010

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