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Are any of you kids bullies towards the others?

I was on another site discussing bullying and was thinking about my oldest who has behavior problems and how she acts towards her siblings.
When she gets angry about having to follow rules she takes it out on them. Along with that she is the oldest and thinks that means she can boss everyone around. All normal childhood stuff (I used to boss my brother around). But I've noticed she's become something of a bully towards them, demanding that they follow only her rules, that they share with her (but not the other way around), physically and emotionally assaulting them.
I have told her in the past that one day one of the kids is going to get fed up with her and just flatten her and I wasn't going to stop it. I think recently she realized her younger brother is much bigger than her and could really hurt her if he decided to really fight back and has laid off him. She now focuses her aggression on her 4yo sister.

 
justanotherjen

Asked by justanotherjen at 12:16 PM on Jul. 3, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 26 (28,174 Credits)
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Answers (5)
  • They can act terrible towards each other especially the older 2 are being 20 months apart. I rarely hear of problems with other kids though. It is always a possibility when you get a group of kids together though. My girls do know that I do not tolerate them being mean to others or even to each other.
    mommybug77

    Answer by mommybug77 at 11:51 PM on Jul. 3, 2010

  • Keeping the peace in my house is an hourly thing any more. I'm constantly on my toes trying to keep her from blowing her lid. I don't allow the bullying which just gets her into more trouble and then she gets even more belligerent and violent blaming her siblings for getting her into trouble (when she was the one doing something wrong, like biting the 4yo). Since, in her mind, she doesn't do anything wrong it can't be her fault that she is in trouble.

    But I'm serious about letting her brother wail on her. I think she needs to learn the lesson from someone her own size. He's been bigger than her for years but defers to her as the oldest but I can see in his eyes that he won't take it much longer. My 7yo is starting to get the same look after years of abuse from her (as much as I try to keep it under control I can't stop all of it). So far her bullying doesn't extend outside the family.
    justanotherjen

    Comment by justanotherjen (original poster) at 12:19 PM on Jul. 3, 2010

  • I was bullied by my brother. ( and my parents never did a thing ) I hope you can nip it in the bud for future sake... Good Luck!
    1lilgirl

    Answer by 1lilgirl at 2:36 PM on Jul. 3, 2010

  • We're going to get her into therapy once we move because her behavior just gets worse every year so hopefully that will help.  She has really pulled the family apart.  No one wants to do anything together any more because she ruins everything with her fits and bullying.


    I hate the bullying.  I mean, siblings are going to fight.  As much as I love my brother and he was one of my best friends growing up we fought all the time (and some times we got violent) but she is just out of control and mean.  She likes to get her brother and sisters in trouble.  It's like she gets a high off of it.  Very disturbing behavior.

    justanotherjen

    Comment by justanotherjen (original poster) at 2:52 PM on Jul. 3, 2010

  • My kids aren't old enough to do that but you can bet your bottom dollar they will NOT or they will learn real quick.
    firenicecream

    Answer by firenicecream at 7:52 PM on Jul. 3, 2010

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