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How do you make oldest child feel LOVED with baby on the way?

My son Joshua is an only child.. so far. has been for 7 years. He has had no idea what would change or that there would be any changes to his life from a brother/sister showing up... However he already has commented to me and my husband that he feels like when the baby gets here we will not want him anymore.

He has said that he doesn't belong in the family anymore..

and

Saddest of all he thinks that we love the baby more than we love him because he gets into trouble.

The baby is litterally still inside me. I have never held it. AND NEITHER HAS ANYONE ELSE.. I don't understand where he gets all this from. But I wish I knew where to turn and how to make him feel more cared for and less sensitive about this. I would love any advice.



 
MAKEMYDAY101

Asked by MAKEMYDAY101 at 6:49 PM on Jul. 4, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 13 (1,302 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (3)
  • Show him pictures of him as a baby and recall baby stories from when he was born and little. If you saved his little outfits and stuff get them out. This is totally natural but you can completely turn it around before the baby is born. Make a big deal of him being a big brother, get those little books geared towards the new big brother, have small token gifts on hand for when people come over with a gift for the new baby but not for him and have him and the new baby exchange gifts in the hospital. Also the first time he comes to the hospital have yourself free to hug him, do not be holding the baby or breastfeeding at the time. Have whoever brings him up call you right beforehand. Good luck! A sibling is the greatest gift you can give him, he just needs time and patience and your love to get used to the idea.
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 6:55 PM on Jul. 4, 2010

  • Lots of extra hugs and kisses! And let him know your going to need his help a lot to. He is going to be a big brother and with that comes special privileges! That baby is going to look up to him more than anyone else!
    crazymom21

    Answer by crazymom21 at 6:54 PM on Jul. 4, 2010

  • I would stress that he's "A BIG BOY and MAMA'S BIG HELPER!" I would also stress that no other child could take the place of "MY #1," who first taught me how to be a Mommy. From there, a comparison contrast on how smart, well developed and helpful he is to me as compared to the new baby!
    Ewadun

    Answer by Ewadun at 7:05 PM on Jul. 4, 2010