Have a question for other moms like you? CafeMom Answers is the mom-only place to get answers to your questions about parenting, your home, and more.
My family is dysfuctional and I want to cut off several people, especially my mom. She was unfit, didn't care about her 7 kids, and put men above us. I grew up dirty, uneducated, and poor. Every time I see her, which is not often, she always has something to compain about and the negative energy brings me down. I am want to better myself so my child can look up to me and I have a positive role model and I just feel that it's best to get rid of negative people in my life. The only reason she's now interested in her kids is because my stepdad passed away and she's all alone. I don't have an emotional connection with her and when she hugs me, I don't feel anything towards her. I just don't want to be around negative people anymore.
Asked by Anonymous at 2:51 PM on Jul. 5, 2010 in Relationships
Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 3:38 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by Scuba at 2:53 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by geminisummerz at 2:54 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 2:54 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by LucasMama08 at 2:56 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
You have really negative feelings about your mother vs her being a negative person right now. Sometimes when a woman has a baby she can have issues like this and counseling may help. That was then and this is now. Being dirty and poor isn't that bad. You don't sound uneducated. You do not have to better yourself for your child to look up to you. What children need is lots of times with mom, unconditional love, and a mom with good parenting skills.
It's normal not to have an emotional connection with the feelings you have. If you thow away your mother now, you are throwing away your child's grandmother. She may be an ok or even good grandmother. If you worked through your issues you may be able to have a mother for decades.
Answer by Gailll at 2:59 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by Safirejewl at 2:54 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by jennette0704 at 2:58 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by figaro8895 at 3:57 PM on Jul. 5, 2010
Answer by older at 3:06 PM on Jul. 5, 2010