Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

What should I do?

Some members of my family don't like my boyfriend because they don't think he's very talkative or friendly. I admit, sometimes he can be standoffish but overall he's a really nice guy to people he's comfortable with. Should I tell them to stay out of our relationship and stop trying to impose their opinions on me?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:18 PM on Jul. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Just explain to them that he's just a little more reserved than they are....there's nothing wrong with that! Let them know that he'll warm up to them as he gets to know them better, I'm sure they'll understand!

    Answer by StellarJKD at 11:20 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • How long have you been dating? Hopefully they will figure out he is a nice guy with a shy side.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 11:21 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • Wow are you my sister? She has a boyfriend who is the exact same way and our family doesn't care for him either. She says he's really outgoing and personable with ppl he knows well and stuff, but with us, you're lucky if you can even squeeze a hi out of him. If its bothering you, then you should tell your family how you feel. Not sure how much good it'll do you since its hard for family members, especially parents, to keep their opinions to themselves, but you could give it a shot. In the mean time, try and get your bf to warm up and be a little more friendly. While I understand being shy around ppl you don't know, I also understand the other side of that and making a bad impression.

    Answer by Ash9724 at 11:21 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • Not being talkative is not a good reason to like anyone. Tell your family they have to give him a chance. Meeting the parents is intimidating and he's not going to feel comfortable right away.

    Answer by lawmom27 at 11:22 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • My husband is like this, and it's hard. I have to communicate between the two and it gets before you get really serious with this guy....ask why he's not making more of an effort...after all, he should want to be apart of your family if you and him are together and the same with should want to be interative and social with his family.
    Trust the long run, it's harder than you think to have a SO/DH that is like this!......

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 11:29 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • He's been in my life for a long time, so it's not like they have just met him and don't really know him. They know he doesn't talk much around people he isn't comfortable with but occasionally in the last few months they've brought up how they don't like him and I'm not sure what i should do.

    Answer by countrygirl1987 at 11:29 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • not everyone is a social butterfly. my husband for example is pretty much antisocial. you'd never know it in a crowd he is a charmer, but he has major anxiety and he backs out of lots of gatherings because he feels uncomfortable. on the other hand, i talk to everyone, but i often come across pretty harsh - i am very blunt, i say what i mean - i don't go around criticizing or anything but people take stuff i say the wrong way at times. being social doesn't equate to niceness - i know plenty of people who are very social and very fake bitches. your family should respect your relationship choice and learn to appreciate him for who he is not for how well he fits their mold. tell them it's hurtful to you that they judge him based on so little information.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:46 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • I have a quiet dh and ya it bothered my dad but wht can ya do. Your family just needs to except it and move on...

    Answer by Judmr at 10:13 AM on Jul. 6, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.