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How to get him to leave...

Last year I found out i was pregnant by a friend...we had no emotional attachment at all, just one of them things. after awhile we decided to try to work something out and try a relationship. we moved in together right before our baby was born. Now that she's 6 months old I want him to move out. I don't think i've been truely happy since I've been in a relationship with him. He doesn't really care about how I feel about anything, he goes on sites like pof.com or swingerville.com and says he just goes there for a fantasy. he talks to girls in appropriatly. I have many conversations with him about what my problem was and how i felt like he was disrespecting me. It doesn't seem to bother him that he makes me cry alot. Problem is, the house we live in is my house, i've told him numerous times to find a place to live, but he just refuses. I don't want it to get bad because of our daughter. How do I get him to go?

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lei-n-hysmom

Asked by lei-n-hysmom at 11:22 PM on Jul. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • you put all his crap out on the lawn and change the locks!
    DarkFaery131

    Answer by DarkFaery131 at 11:23 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • Give him 30 days to find a place, after that change the locks.
    kira25

    Answer by kira25 at 11:25 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • Give him a two week notice. Say if he's not moved out by then, you will be placing his belongings on the driveway and calling the cops. Tell him why you want him out as well. It's not working out, your not happy, and lets figure out visitation for our daughter!
    CAGirl4

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 11:25 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • You give him a deadline for moving out and then, if he doesn't, you call the cops and have him escorted out. It's too bad that it's come to this but it wasn't exactly a good start for a relationship, now was it?
    ceallaigh

    Answer by ceallaigh at 11:25 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • That is emotional abuse, and it is real. Get a restraining order, that way he has to stay away, pack up his things and change the lock and your phone number. You didn't say whether you rent or own a house. But if you rent and he disturbs the neighbors, the landlord will want him out. Good luck!
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 11:26 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • I own my house.. he also has 2 big dogs, that i'm not too fond of, but he can't afford a place for him and his dogs. I feel bad, but this is not my problem. I can't seem to get it through to him that he needs to find a place.
    I think I'm too much of a sucker. He's either saying i'm being racist cause he's black, or he's gonna kill himself because he can't handle this. I make a bit more money than he does, so he thinks that since i'm in a better place than he is that I should give him a break because we have a kid together.
    lei-n-hysmom

    Comment by lei-n-hysmom (original poster) at 11:31 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • i think that if you want someone out of your house that bad and they still arent out that maybe you dont really want him to leave. theres no possible way a strong woman would put up with that junk (not saying your not a strong woman) i just have to be blunt because my best friend is in the same situation. but i cannot feel bad for her one bit because she chooses to keep herself in that situation. if you dont feel like things are good for you to bad, but if they arent good for your child you have to put your child first. my babys father is someone that i have no emotional attachment to. hes a pos and i would never give him the time of day just because he enjoyed his self( if ya know what i meen) and ended up making a baby that way.
    mcdonaldm9696

    Answer by mcdonaldm9696 at 11:37 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • LMAO - your child is half black but he's calling you a racist?? nice. you've already done the part where you tried to make a relationship and a family for your child, and it's not working. don't let him continue to manipulate and use you with his nonsense. he's a user and a liar - if you want to have friendly chats why use swingerville?? come ON!!! he needs to go. you are not obligated to support him because you have a child together... wait, that makes HIM obligated to support YOUR CHILD, no?? if he can't afford the dogs, then he should find them another home. he's not gonna kill himself - that's just a manipulation tactic. he can better himself of his own accord just like you did. you don't have to live that way. one thing you need to do is check the laws about residency. where i live it's not as simple as putting someone's stuff out. do it legally. don't feel bad - you need this.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:42 PM on Jul. 5, 2010

  • I would consider consulting a lawyer so it is done legally--then change the locks and put his stuff on the curb.
    happytexasCM

    Answer by happytexasCM at 12:00 AM on Jul. 6, 2010

  • most states require that u actually go though a process of eviction. usually a 30 day notice, though some states it might be 60- u give him thta notice, typed and signed, than give him his time, than after 30 days call the cops- this is YOUR home ad YOUR life. do not feel bad and let him walk all over you. if you truly want him out, u will stop feeling bad for him, and start feeling bad for yourself, and maybe that will give u the kick in the butt to get him the F out.
    JnCV

    Answer by JnCV at 12:16 AM on Jul. 6, 2010

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