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How old is too old?

I have been dating a man that is 19 years older than me. We have been seeing each other for a year now and things have been going well. I am 29 and he is 48. He has 3 daughters, 1 of which is just a year older than I am.
Soo I am trying not to feel like a sleazy mistress or what not, but people do give us a hard time because of the age difference, and many times I feel ackward around his family because they think I'm taking advantage of him for some reason, which is not true at all. My question is, is the age difference too large? What do I do about everyone's nasty opinions beside just ignoring them?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:46 AM on Jul. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • if u want to continue then do so. get a thicker skin because you will gain respect by showing that you do what you despite undesirable attention.
    MoMoFu

    Answer by MoMoFu at 1:49 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • explain to them that you care for him and have him explain, if they support him they will except you or just be @$$#0l3$
    Rachelxbby

    Answer by Rachelxbby at 1:57 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • If you guys have a good relationship then you can't worry about what other people think. The next time someone makes a comment that you don't like just tell them to mind their own business.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 1:59 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • I think it's too old, I would never date a guy that was old enough to be my father. I think my personal limit would be 10 years older. It would be WAY to weird or awkward to date someone that had a kid OLDER than me. It would be so weird for the daughter too, having your dad date someone younger than you would just be creepy.
    Blueliner

    Answer by Blueliner at 2:02 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • If you both are happy then who cares?? My dad is dating a girl about 5 year old then me...You know what i think of that? If my dad is happy I am happy!
    DilsMommy

    Answer by DilsMommy at 2:02 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • All I can tell you is that my father was 13 years older than my mother and they were happily married until he passed away 5 days before their 49th anniversary. 


    I think having stepchildren who are older than you would be a bigger issue than the age difference. 

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 6:19 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • I think it's too much of an age difference. I was married to a man who is 13 years older than me for 12 years. The first couple of years were great, we got along well and just ignored whatever people said. It was definitely awkward when his son would visit because I was closer in age to him (8 years difference) than to his dad and he and I could talk about things his dad was clueless about. After a few years, it just got to be too much and the differences between our ages really started showing. I was wanting to go out and do things, he had "been there, done that" and wasn't interested. Also, it was weird being around his family - their kids were all grown and I was just starting out. Very different. Just from experience, I wouldn't date a man who was more than 5 - 7 years older than me.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 7:12 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • if you were in your early 20s i would caution you that you have alot of growing and changing to do. and of course at 29 you are still growing and changing, but by now you probably have a pretty good sense of yourself. it is a big age difference, but really it depends on the two of you. i might wonder about him being attracted to a woman the same age his daughters - that does give one pause, but then you can't help who you love. examine the relationship to determine what you have in common - are you really on the same wavelength with this guy or is it nice to just have someone mature and established who takes care of you? not that there's anything wrong with that, but it doesn't necessary make a relationship. only you know what is the truth. if you are certain of your feelings and his, hold your head up and do your thing... always in life someone will try to criticize something you are doing....
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:32 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • You really have to think of your future when dating somone nearly 20 years older. Do you want to have more children? Will you have a decent sex life in 10 years? When he REALLY begins to age, will you still find him attractive? How will his children feel about you? Do you want Step children that are older than you? You really have to ask yourself all these questions. My DH is 12 years older than me I'm 28, he's 40. We've been together for almost 5 years. When i was 23, it was scary. He actually greyed very early at the age of 25, so by the time he was 35...he was all greay wich made him look older. We DEFINITELY got looks. But, as we both got over the looks & didn't care so much what others thought, they stopped looking. We soon felt natural together, so i guess we looked natural together. BUT, he's never been married & has no kids. I'm his first wife & my DD is his first child. Just think this through, pro & con list...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 7:45 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • I think the question to you should be, what do YOU want to do? You are old enough to make your own decisions but you can't stop others from thinking what they want to think. People judge others. It's just the way it is. It's not right but it is the way it is. I see no other option than to ignore them if he's who you want. My x got up with a woman the same age as our youngest child. It didn't bother me but my kids don't respect her. Good luck on this
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:56 AM on Jul. 7, 2010

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