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Are Funerals too much expense? Why are they avoiding them?

I have lost a total of 3 people who were close to me since January of this year yet everytime I inquired about the funeral I was told the same thing. "We're not having a funeral." Ok... but we didn't have a wake or a memorial or anything else. It seems so strange to me that you live your whole life and when you die we just cremate you and go back to work the next day. I don't understand. What about closure, or just meeting with all the people you never see except at a funeral? When do you cry and reminisce? What do you think? Is my whole family just whacked or am I overreacting??


Asked by Blabbermouth at 3:16 PM on Jul. 7, 2010 in Health

Level 17 (3,668 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Funerals are expensive, but it is nice to have some sort of ceremony to remember the one who has passed. Two relatives of mine have died recently and there was no service. It is like I wonder if they are really gone! Having a service, no matter how simple, helps people accept what happened. Go to the cemetary and sit and reflect if that would help you. Best wishes.

    Answer by elizabr at 6:06 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • Honestly, I don't like funerals. Our daughter was cremated and we had no service or funeral. When we adopted our middle daughter from China we took a portion of her ashes with us and scattered them there. It was personal to us and what we needed to do to have closure. You can grieve without going to a memorial, funeral, wake, etc.... I have never needed a memorial to grieve and say goodbye to a loved one so maybe I'm bizarre. LOL

    Answer by mcginnisc at 3:20 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • My dad said he doesnt want one. Whenever its time hes going to be cremated. He said whats the point of rotting in the ground, no one goes to see you after a while. He doesnt want anything held in his honor. I think it sucks big time, but its our job to respect their wishes.

    Answer by BrittanyD07 at 3:24 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • That is surprising to me but we buried my great aunt a few months back and it was over $13,000. Some people just can't afford services but you would think somebody would have some kind of get together or something.

    Answer by kc932 at 3:18 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • some people don't have the 12,000 dollars that the average funeral costs

    Answer by aliishott2 at 3:19 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • I wouldn't want the traditional expensive funeral. But I'd want my family to have maybe a BBQ or something. I never understood spending a lot on a funeral.

    Answer by silly2plustwins at 3:19 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • I havent heard of anyone not atleast having a service or wake of some sort. So yes, its' strange. But I can understand it from a financial point of view.

    Answer by bumblebeestingu at 3:21 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • ummm I guess its expensive to die these days.. lol bad joke.. But we usually have a funeral and ceremony for someone who has passed away. I am from a Navajo Tribe and we dont get life insurance because we believe we should enjoy life and not planning our death. So when a loved one dies the whole living family, which includes sister brothers mothers fathers aunts uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc.. all pitch in as a family to have a funeral and help those who who are grieving.,.

    Answer by navajomama7 at 3:21 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • Funerals can be expensive but I do think theyre necessary. Like you said, if for nothing more than closure. My family doesnt beleive in cremation so we bury our loved ones. Since we're already going to that expense, it only makes sense for us to have a gathering, usually a potluck or church dinner type thing. Some things just shouldnt be about finances.

    Answer by Aqua_Jen at 3:22 PM on Jul. 7, 2010

  • I hate funerals and don't want one. I suppose I'm just weird though because I also hate weddings.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 3:26 PM on Jul. 7, 2010