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2 Bumps

joke

Tell me something funny to make me laugh?

 
wenona_mandy

Asked by wenona_mandy at 2:57 PM on Jul. 8, 2010 in Crazy for Credits

Level 18 (5,394 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • ill send u a pic of my fil lol j/k
    san78

    Answer by san78 at 2:58 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Two antennas met on the roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was terrific!
    kuriequinn

    Answer by kuriequinn at 3:01 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve food here."
    kuriequinn

    Answer by kuriequinn at 3:03 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • A pair of jumper cables walks into the bar. The bartender says "We will serve you but don't start anything."
    kuriequinn

    Answer by kuriequinn at 3:03 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
    On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
    "What?" said the puzzled groom.
    "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
    "Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
    Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
    Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
    Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 3:04 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
    Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
    Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
    Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
    Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
    Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
    "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
    "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 3:05 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Little Johnny likes to gamble.

    One day his dad gets a new job so his family has to move to a new city.

    Johnny's daddy thinks, "I'll get a head start on Johnny's gambling."

    So he calls the teacher and says, "My son Johnny will be starting your class tomorrow but he likes to gamble so you'll have to keep an eye on him."

    The teacher says OK, she can handle it.

    The next day Johnny walks into class and hands the teacher an apple and says, "Hi, my name is Johnny."

    She says yes I know who you are.
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 3:07 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Johnny smiles and says, "I bet you ten dollars you've got a mole on your butt."

    The teacher thinks that she will break his little gambling problem so she takes him up on the bet.

    She pulls her pants down and shows him her butt and there was no mole.

    That afternoon, Johnny goes home and tells his dad that he lost ten dollars to the teacher and why.

    So his dad calls the teacher and says, "Johnny said that he bet you that you had a mole on your butt and he lost."

    The teacher says, "Yeah, and I think I broke his gambling problem."

    Johnny's dad laughs and says, "No you didn't, he bet me a hundred dollars this morning that he'd see your ass before the day was over."
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 3:07 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

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