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2 Bumps

Emotional Infidelity

Has anyone here dealt with it? How did you find out? Did you stay in the relationship, or did you leave? Why? IF you stayed how did you regain trust in that person? Did you have kids with this person? How long were you together when this occurred? How did you confront it? Were you happy with your decision? How long did it take you to trust that person again?

I was hit with a ton of bricks on Sunday night, because the one an donly time I go to use my husband's cell, because mine was dead, there was a text from a girl, and then there was email correspondence, and more texts and pictures and it's been going on since 2007. I am so hurt and confused. I have hardly slept since then, and today was the first day I could eat more than a bite without feeling like I was going to vomit. I still am walking around with a knot in the pit of my stomach and feel very on edge.
Any and all input is appreciated.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Jul. 8, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (4)
  • Confront him ASAP if you haven't yet. You can't let him do this to you, you deserve better and he needs to know that you know.
    HuskerMommy08

    Answer by HuskerMommy08 at 4:27 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • I went through the same thing. I discussed it with my husband. Arguments went on. I was so hurt because I gave him the opportunity to tell me the truth and he continued to lie. I gave him the choice, it was either family (me and the kids) or other women. At first he chose other women, I filed for divorce. But then he changed and gave me access to all his passwords. I'm sorry you are going through this. I know it sucks. Just hang in there. Think positive and hope that things will work out. If things don't work out you have support here on Cafe Mom. :-)
    monkeedork

    Answer by monkeedork at 4:33 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • I'm so sorry, I would definitely confront him right away, this is not okay. I wish I had more advice for you but your just going to have sit down with your husband and demand some answers.

    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 5:25 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • I think I would have taken the phone and gone directly to him and asked him if he would like to explain to me exactly what this means. Since you didn't do that, then you really should tell him what you saw at the earliest possible opportunity. It doesn't have to mean the end of anything, and it just might mean the beginning of something better than you have had with him before now. Forgiveness is a choice. It's a matter of setting your will in line with God's and saying that you choose to forgive. That doesn't mean that everything goes back to the way it was before. It only means that you choose to release your anger and bitterness to God and allow Him to deal with it. I doubt that just saying one time you choose to forgive will be enough to get the job done here. Your husband owes you an apology and it should come in the form of whatever means apology to you. Most of the time it takes more than just a simple "sorry."
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:20 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

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