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What would you do?

So I have a sister in law who comes over, raids the fridge and cupboards. Asks what there is to eat and picks at any food she sees out. All this in the first 10 minutes of coming over to our house. The biggest thing that ticks me off is that she will walk up to my kid's plates while they are eating a meal or snack and start eating food off their plate. She is very rude!!! How would you approach this without being rude yourself?

 
hotrodmomma

Asked by hotrodmomma at 9:02 PM on Jul. 8, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 18 (6,309 Credits)
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Answers (13)
  • Simply tell her like it is. Sorry, I don't have an issue with people raiding my fridge, etc. But you had better damn well not touch what my babies are eating, or I'll go all momma bear on you!
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 9:13 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • if she is being that rude i would not have a problem with being rude right back.
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 9:05 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Hmmm make liver and onions. (:
    Cochise

    Answer by Cochise at 9:03 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • oh and liverwurst with lima beans.
    Cochise

    Answer by Cochise at 9:03 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • I would probably say, " Excuse me but if you would like to eat over I need some notice. We don't have enough money for you to come over whenever and eat whatever you like." And as far as her eating off the kids' plates I would be mad, show it, and say, " Uh huh now that's not acceptable. That food is for ______(child's name) not you. I'd appreciate it if you would stop taking the food literally right from my children's mouths." I realize this sounds easier said than really said but she needs to be put in her place and made to feel uncomfortable about what she's doing or she'll keep doing it. Buck up and say something with conviction or she'll just take advantage of you because you let her.
    JennCharisma

    Answer by JennCharisma at 9:16 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Lock up the cabinets & refrigerator. Seriously, go out and buy a bunch of child-proof locks and install them. They make them for refrigerators, too. Then, the next time you know she is coming over, lock everything up and make sure the kids have already eaten. If she asks why everything is locked up, simply tell her it's because you don't like other people pawing through your cabinets (you are not directly accusing her, so technically not being rude to her). If she starts to take a lock off or asks you for something, tell her I'm sorry, but we're not eating right now and walk away. Unless she's total trash, she wouldn't dare try to take one of those locks off to help herself.

    You may also want to consider teaching your children to make a big fuss everytime she mooches off their plates. Since you don't want to be direct about it, letting the kids share their feelings about "auntie" may be the best way to go.
    mom2aspclboy

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 9:20 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • I wouldn't consider teaching your children to protest their aunt eating off their plates as being rude at all. Defending yourself is not being rude. Stopping someone from taking something from you without your permission is not being rude. Don't you teach your children to speak up if another child takes their toy or pushes them or hurts their feelings? Speaking up for themselves is NOT teaching them to be rude.

    But getting back to your question....would DH be willing to forbid his DS from coming over for a long while? Maybe limit family visits to other relatives homes or just places outside of your home?
    mom2aspclboy

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 9:34 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • Lock your doors, and don't answer if she does come over......lol That's just me though....
    CAGirl4

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 9:04 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • I would rather be rude right back but she is my DH's twin and he would rather me not be rude but when he is even half rude to her nothing still changes!
    hotrodmomma

    Comment by hotrodmomma (original poster) at 9:09 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

  • ya that's the deal she is an unusually rude person and nothing hurts her feelings or offends her and for sure she never feels uncomfortable about anything!!!! And yes she is one of those trashy people (thank the Lord my DH is nothing like her!) And yes my basic goal is to not teach my children to be rude over 1 very rude person- so at least I would like to set the good example.
    hotrodmomma

    Comment by hotrodmomma (original poster) at 9:28 PM on Jul. 8, 2010

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