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need advice on what to say

my husbands relative whom he is really close to is having problems with his wife. They have a 18 month old and one on the way. The pasted few weeks he has not been coming home or talking to his wife. His wife says she has no idea what is going on. When his mother and other realtives try to talk to him and find out what is going on with him, he claims up. I really dont know whats up, he is useally realy good guy, I dont know what is with him lately. Me n hubby lives in another state, so my hubby isnt sure whats up either.His wife and his mother heard from a reliable source that he has been telling people at work she has packed up and went to her mothers n left him We are going to pay them a visit really soon and talk with them. I just want some advice on what we can say to them to at least get them talking agian and working on whats tearing them apart. We really care about both of them and dont wanna see another broken family

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:42 AM on Jul. 9, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Well first just because its a reliable source, doesnt mean that its correct. So when you get there you will know if it was true or not. So dont go in with guns blazing. I dont know if I could handle my hubby not coming home or not talking. It really sounds like he has an underlying issue, and some one needs to find out without making him mad. You should definately talk to the wife and find out what happened when the whole thing started, it could his job is stressing him out especially with the new kiddo on the way.
    Good luck
    browningmom

    Answer by browningmom at 12:48 AM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Other then giving them the name and number of a great couples counselor, there isn't a role for you here.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:19 AM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Sorry, I don't think you should advise anything. At best, just listen if anyone wants to talk.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:36 AM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • I would be careful about getting in the middle of it, just be friends and if they want you and your husband to know thier business they will tell you.

    Always remember there are 3 sides to every story HIS, HERS and the truth in the middle.
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 3:32 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Unless you have background in counselling or something don't get involved in this. It has nothing to do with either of you. Let those people live their lives and get on with things. And I don't think visitors with agendas would be all that welcome in my house either. Stay out of it or risk alienating someone if not all of their family. They need silent support for whatever path they choose during this trying time. Nobody else can fix it and nothing you say will magically make anything better. Plus you are definitely not in the know on the whole story obviously so save your judgements for if and when you get more information.
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 1:34 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

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