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2 Bumps

My friend's SO has become abusive..

My friend's SO of 10 years recently told her he hasn't loved her for years, never wanted their daughter (she is 4) and since then has become violent and verbally abusive on an almost daily basis. My friend is in complete denial and still understandable doesn't get where all this came from. She won't kick him out and keeps hoping he will "come around" but things just keep getting worse, he has never been abusive before. Even their daughter has caught on and keeps making comments about how daddy hates mommy. How do I help, or do I stay out of it??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:26 PM on Jul. 9, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (4)
  • Sudden personality changes can signal some pretty serious health issues, so aside from your friend kicking him out he needs to go see a doctor.

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 1:31 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • well, I say it's up to your friend if she wants to stay with the guy, but if it was me, I'd do all I could to get that little girl out of that house and fast!
    your friend is a adult and that 4 year old is a child.
    I think in this case your friend is not thinking clearly as many women don't in these situations. I don't think she could realistically take care a child in this situation.

    I say talk to some trusted relatives of that kid and see what can be done. if you have to, call DCF.

    please don't leave that child to fend for herself in that household along side a parent that is probably teaching her that 'it's ok to act that way, because deep down we know that daddy doesn't mean it' she may even be telling the little girl that much of this is her or mommys fault!
    believe me, I know what that's like! I was that kid for years-

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 1:35 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Let her know that you are there to help her and she has a safe place to go to (your home) with her daughter in the event that she needs it. Also that you will help her if she needs to make a "change" in her life. Sometimes if you know you have someone to help you out by just being there, you have the courage to do what you didn't think you could. If you are there & things get violent, then You call the Police. That poor girl!! :(

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 1:35 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • of course you want friend to be safe but you dont know what to do but yeah your friend boyfriend should get checked out

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 6:37 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

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