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I'm baffled. Can anyone please clarify this for me?

How on earth can there be women out there that bring children into the world and not love them? I don't understand it. Can anyone make sense of this for me? (I'm not talking about anyone on here, btw. Talking about my dd's bio-mom)

Answer Question
 
nicolemstacy

Asked by nicolemstacy at 11:53 PM on Jul. 9, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 19 (7,807 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • I will never understand how a mother could not love her own child:(
    JeanetteRene

    Answer by JeanetteRene at 11:54 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • I don't get it either. How you can feel that baby growing inside you and give birth and not love them with all your heart just seems impossible to me. (the "you" is in general)
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 11:55 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Its just like how to intentionally hurt a child? I dont understand it and never will.
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 11:56 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • I don't get it either. I can understand how some women possibly may not expect to love the child..but to actually see them, hold them, etc...I don't get it. I knew a girl who raised her son for a YEAR, and then decided that she "didn't want to be a mom anymore" bc she met a new guy. She moved across the country from him. I look at my son, and being away from him is the worst possible thing I could ever imagine in my entire life. I love him more than life itself.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 11:56 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • I can't clarify this for you because I just can not wrap my brain around how any woman can carry and give birth to a baby and not love it?????????? It happens but wny?? The poor little ones born into these situations!!!!!
    Truluv4ever

    Answer by Truluv4ever at 11:56 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Some people have no feeling. They can't rationalize the idea of loving someone, like a child, without conditions. There love is replaced by anger or hurt and they take it out on the child. If this is the situation you are encountering with your DD's Bio Mom. You should find help and keep the child safe and the Bio Mom arrested....Good luck!
    gogogirl79

    Answer by gogogirl79 at 11:57 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • She lost custody of her and is now "fighting" for her because she has it set in her mind that she will get child support. It breaks my heart because I know what it does to my dd. (Technically she's my sd, but she calls me mommy and I love her no differently than my own. As far as I'm concerned, she's my daughter)
    nicolemstacy

    Comment by nicolemstacy (original poster) at 11:59 PM on Jul. 9, 2010

  • Some people are sociopaths.
    Some are just assholes. No, sorry. An asshole serves a useful purpose...some people are just hemorrhoids.

    I know of "reasons" why but I will never fully understand them because my brain can't fathom the idea of not loving a child, especially one that you created in your womb, carried, and birthed. A child that very literally was a part of you.
    I can't imagine my life without my kids. I can't imagine not loving them the way that I do and I can't understand how all mothers don't feel that amazing and intense love that comes from being a mother.
    It's crazy.
    Laila-May

    Answer by Laila-May at 12:01 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • It's obvioulsy something making their brain not function properly. Extreme narcissim, or clinical seperatlon from their emotions. Even extreme PPD can cause an emotional distance.
    new_mom808

    Answer by new_mom808 at 12:02 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • I do not understand it either but unfortunately the nightly news reports differently. I always found it sad when I hear of child abuse/murder cases that involved the child's parents, but it does something totally different to me now that I am a parent. I just do not get. How can you look into the face of your own child, that you helped create, the depended on you to grow inside and not feel love for them. It is a mystery that I will never understand I quess. I look into my daughter's eyes and all I see and feel is love for her, nothing else. No hatred, no angry. Just pure and simple love...a most precious thing!
    vickwu

    Answer by vickwu at 12:06 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

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