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How do I convince him not to spank?

I am due anyday with our first baby boy and me and SO disagree on the whole spanking issue. I say no that there are better ways to disipline(my opinion) and he says yes that his parents did it and he turned out fine and got him to listen. Any ideas of how to explain to him that I DO NOT WANT THIS HAPPENING?!?! Obviously it wouldnt happen when hes 2 weeks old but in the future...

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:18 AM on Jul. 10, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I have this same issue. I don't spank and my hubbie does. When he does it to the kids we always end up arguing and to this day- we have yet to change the others mind. I just take it upon myself to get to the misbehaving child before he does and then I"m the one who dishes out the punishment and not him. It works most of the time.

    IhartU

    Answer by IhartU at 6:53 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • Spanking does work, so he is right about that. However, this is something that should have been agreed upon before having children. Now, when the two of you argue about this, as you surely will, your child is going to grow up very confused about who he should listen to, and he will forever be playing the two of you against each other.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:18 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • My hubby occasionally spanks our son for things like hitting, pinching or biting. I've told him that hitting our son to stop him from hitting makes no sense. Our son has special needs so he doesn't always understand what he's doing is wrong, it just feels good to him or he's really frustrated about something. I'm not pro spanking unless it's for something dangerous (running out into the road after being told no a couple of times, etc).
    Catie_W1015

    Answer by Catie_W1015 at 7:50 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • Oh honey! This is one of those topics for couple to agree on before deciding to have a child together. Unfortunately, there is no middle ground: either your believe it is ok to teach a child that hitting solves problems, or your don't.
    Please, please, please sit down with a neutral third party, like a couples counselor or clergyperson and get this worked out.

    And congratulations on your new family member!!!
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:26 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • Read some books on discipline and pick some ways that you like and talk it over. He should be willing to try your ideas first, like time out, taking away what the child loves etc. Every child has some currency, that which he absolutely loves, and withholding that works wonders. Dr Phil has a good book on this plus so many others
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:52 AM on Jul. 10, 2010

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