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When your child has been potty training for a while do you punish them for having accidents?

My two year old has been potty training for quite a while (ten months) and for the most part does VERY VERY well. She is in undies almost all the time (besides nap time, bed time and when we're in the car). However, she is sometimes lazy - too busy doing something else - and just doesn't go to the potty. She knows better, she just refuses to stop playing to get up and go.

SO, I know everyone says not to punish a potty training child, etc. but after this much time and her simply not getting up and going, does that warrant a time out? Or do you just continue to let them pee in their pants because they don't feel like going?

:-/ ???


Asked by FatGirl239 at 3:37 PM on Jul. 10, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (10)
  • HA ha looks like i was reading my own question i asked myself that question the other dd is 20 months old and exact the same way, i take her and put her on the potty and tell her pee-pee goes in the potty not in your panties and she would cover her face with her little hands (she covers her face with her hands when she knows she has done something wrong). i would say to her "where do the pee pee go?" and i would wait till she answers me and she says "in the potty"..And i would say ok. Now dont pee pee in your panties anymore ok. and she wouldent pee in them for a couple days! GOod Luck!

    Answer by mommylisar at 12:11 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • I think it is fine to let her know that you expect her to use the potty when she has to go, but I don't agree with punishment. Perhaps a better solution might be to take her to the bathroom once an hour or so and let her give it a try.

    Answer by neebug3766 at 3:40 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • i wouldnt punish. just let the kid know i was very disapointed, that i thought they were a big girl but i guess i was wrong...unless she is going to start going in the potty everytime.

    Answer by jennifer588 at 3:40 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • My daughter would get busy playing and just keep trying to hold it and have tiny accidents on the way to the bathroom, just a few drops. I just made her throw her panties away that she leaked in. It was on purpose, she knew she had to go just didn't want to.
    Of course, when she was sleeping or doing something else, I'd take them out of the trash and put them in the washer. Those things are too expensive to just throw out!
    After 4 or 5 times of having to trash her panties, she stopped. I didn't make a big deal about it, just told her she needed to go when she felt the need and to stop what she was doing. We didn't look at is as a punishment, but more like a deterrent.
    No more accidents!

    Answer by Kiwismommy19 at 3:41 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • I don't think that punshing her is exactly wrong but try to do it in a different way, for example instead of time-outs ask her if she's a baby and therefore wants to wear nappies full time? And tell her that that is what you will have to do if you she doesn't stop with her accidents. Also be sure to praise her SO much everytime she doesn't go in her pants, perhaps then she'll look forward to the praise so much that she won't do it. Good luck!

    Answer by leah_rai at 3:43 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • my youngest kinda did this....she was potty trained for a year then had an accident at my oldest daughters preschool....I wasn't very upset and I actually told her that it was ok...I thought shed be a little embarrassed so I didn't wanna be to hard on her but then when she kept doing it and didn't even tell me that she had to go pee yes I did put her on time out and she wasn't allowed to go with us to my oldests preschool after she lost that priviledge she didn't do it again.

    Answer by babyangelromero at 3:45 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • Yes, I would punish. I wouldn't consider it potty "training" anymore...not after 10 months. If you've already told her not to wait too long and go before she has an accident and if she's already accomplished that, she is "trained", she shouldn't be having continuous accidents. By allowing accidents she is flat out disobeying you. She knows exactly what she is supposed to do and what you expect her to do. Yet she is refusing to obey you.....which should be punished. In addition you have to supplement and follow up the punishment with very strong praise when she does do as you ask!

    Answer by michellelvs4 at 3:56 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • Depends on if the accidents are intentional or not. Some children do regress and have accidents that they didn't intend. However, some children (like my niece) would do it for attention. She was .. 4 at the time I believe. If it was intentional, then yes she should get punished. However, if it isn't intentional then now. She should just be reminded what you trained her to do. Use the potty.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 4:05 PM on Jul. 10, 2010

  • i agree with the throwing the underwear away (and then getting them back out lol). if it is a consistant thing that she is having accidents...take her to the potty every hour. good at this age are so strong willed. lol

    Answer by mlrjbuzz at 10:25 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • I'd never punish my daughter for an accident. They don't have a great amount of discipline or control at this age. Guide her, get her to potty more often, but never ever punish. You'll have the opposite effect, and she'll be wetting more often. If you don't believe me, pick up any book on potty training written by experts, and they will all tell you this is a huge no-no.

    Answer by boswellsgirl25 at 7:52 AM on Jul. 12, 2010