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How tell my children thier new sibiling has different dad?

Hello, I have 3 children ages 10,8, and 6, all with the same man. We have broken up about 3-4 years now. I am currently pregnant with my ex boyfriend child, whome my children never met. the baby is due in abt 2 months. Should I tell my children that the child I am carrying is by another man or do you think its too much for children to grasp? more of the reason i ask is bc this child will obviously look different since he will be biracial. Thanks for the advice.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:45 AM on Jul. 11, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • tell them. my ds is 4 and knows he has a diff dad than his sister (who will be one next month) imo they should be old enough that if you sit down with them and allow them to ask questions they should be able to understand. and where do they think the baby is coming from if it has been a few years since their dad has been out of the pic that long...
    mommy06and09

    Answer by mommy06and09 at 2:50 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • i think its too muchm kids dont care about that stuff anyways just let them be kids and enjoy the new baby on the way, its exciting for you and them, dont complicate it ya know, if they ask then tell them. i think they are at an age where they would freely ask questions
    emleejanedom

    Answer by emleejanedom at 2:51 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • Children understand more then we think they do. Just explain to them that this baby has a different daddy then there's but regardless this baby is there sister or brother regardless of the skin color or looks.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 3:07 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • So you have a boyfriend who is important enough to you to have a child with you, yet not important enough to meet your children?

    I would have the boyfriend over, and introduce him as the father of their new sibling.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 7:46 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • If they ask, answer with the truth. Don't make a big deal out of it. Just simply stated as fact and move on.

    Example:
    "Mommy, why does baby look different from us?"
    "Because baby has a different daddy and she looks more like him."

    I believe in answering children's questions honestly. They'll ask what they're ready to ask, there is no need to offer more than that until they are ready - and they'll let you know when they are ready by asking more questions. Let them guide you in that way.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 9:11 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • rkoloms, she said he was her EX boyfriend.
    Arisce

    Answer by Arisce at 11:51 AM on Jul. 11, 2010

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