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would this PISS you off or am i just a clingy girlfriend?

so bf and i have been together 4 years and for a while he had almost cut off his friends and has recently in the past year been spending quite a bit of time away from home with them. he is an aspiring rapper(hobby) and on at least one to 2 nights a week he goes to the studio with his friends until the wee hours of the morning, and maybe once or twice a month they will go to a nightclub. also he HAS to visit them 2 times a week at least after work just to grab a beer, etc. so he went clubbing last night after i got off work, came home at 5 am, went to work, and was supposed to get off at 2, he stayed over and got off at 4, then calls and says hes going to his friends house for a beer and will be home by 6. its 6:30 dinner is done and getting cold and i am lonely and bored! why must he be with them so much? i never leave the house like that and would rather be with the family anyway! i just want to scream at him! overreacting???

 
secondtyme520

Asked by secondtyme520 at 6:27 PM on Jul. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,344 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I would be mad too. I had an ex that would do this. He NEVER spent time with me. I put up with his crap for about 3 years. If you can not come to a compromise then maybe you should go your separate ways. Like someone already said. If he makes it big you will see him a lot less. Is that the kind of life you want and are willing to live?

    Shaylyn318

    Answer by Shaylyn318 at 9:02 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • I don't think you're overreacting, I would be pissed too, but it all boils down to whether or not you're willing to put up with it. If my boyfriend were treating me that way I'd leave him, because (for me) that's completely disrespectful (assuming you've talked to him about how you feel). You should sit down and talk to him, see what he's thinking, why he's going out so much, and see if he's willing to stay with you a little more.
    Georgie0502

    Answer by Georgie0502 at 6:35 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • It just sounds like the two of you are in different phases of your lives
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:47 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • Well if you trust him and have no issues on what he is doing, then you are overacting. Then again He needs to be made aware he did tell you a time frame he would be home and etc. So sit down and compromise. In order to have a good relationship you got to have honesty, trust, and love. Without just one you have nothing. He needs time with his friends as well as you do then ya'll need time together alone. I hope this helps as it was meant too. Hugs
    CloudWeaver

    Answer by CloudWeaver at 6:30 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • Maybe next time ask him to ride with a friend, or ask him to let you drop him off where he is going so you can go out and do something too.
    BlainesMommy09

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 6:40 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • if you believe in him and want him to be successful as a rapper then i believe that goes with the job...he should promote himself and thats the only way to do so.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 6:30 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • thanks shay, but my problem is that i dont know if thats the lifestyle i want, i dont want to trade intimacy and time with my partner for some rap career that could blow up and make big or not make it anywhere at all. but when i try to compromise with him, he always finds a way to bend what we agreed on, and i try not to make a big stnk over it, like i compromised last night, i told him he could go out (didnt even ask what time he'd be home or where he was going). and then he calls saying hes going to his friends again today! maybe i wouldnt mind as much if i actually had a strong social life and we had 2 cars, bc while hes out, im home, carless and alone with all of my friend living at least 30 minutes away from me! i dont want him to spend all his time with me but damn i would like him to want to be home more than he wants to be away
    secondtyme520

    Comment by secondtyme520 (original poster) at 6:36 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • have you told him it bothers you? If not than you probably are over reacting. But if he is a good rapper and ever does become famous he will be gone a lot more than a couple nights a week. Talk to him about it. He may not know it bothers you, he probably feels he is doing nothing wrong.
    BlainesMommy09

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 6:39 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • you are not overreacting at all. i would put a stop to that right now wether it be by him stopping or you moving on.
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 6:45 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

  • You need to let him do his thing and you find something you like to do.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 7:26 PM on Jul. 11, 2010

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