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should this have hurt my feelings or am i just thinking too hard?

so last night me and my SO were laying on the couch watching TV, and we were in a deep discussion about something and he said "I love everything about you, but if I could change one thing I would make your stomach a little flatter" OMG that hurt my feelings so bad...I didn't show him it hurt my feelings tho. Would it have hurt your feelings too? Or am I just sensitive?

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Brianna-Ravae

Asked by Brianna-Ravae at 10:52 AM on Jul. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Level 10 (483 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • OH NO! That would kill me too! I mean, I know I THINK dh thinks things like that, but to hear it said outloud!

    I would have turned to him in all seriousness and said, "I love everything about you too, but if I could change one thing, I would make your penis a good bit bigger"

    That would have been close to equal. Just imagine his face! Maybe that image alone will make you feel better! lol
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 10:55 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • That's when I would have said something about him in return. Just to let him know how it feels. I would have been offended.
    DesertRose75

    Answer by DesertRose75 at 10:55 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • If my hubby would of said that to me my feelings would have been hurt and i would of been pissed lol
    gfam6

    Answer by gfam6 at 10:55 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I agree with the ladies above, I would have been offended, but I am sure there are things about him you would want different too, tell them what they are and you will be even!
    older

    Answer by older at 10:57 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • What an ass. I would say, I love everything about you, but if I could change one thing it would be that you would be a little bit smarter!!!
    KTMOM

    Answer by KTMOM at 10:59 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • In my hormonal state I would have punched him in the face.
    Savymom25

    Answer by Savymom25 at 11:00 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • It would not have hurt my feelings that he said that. What it would have done for me was to point out the shallowness of his understanding of what true love even is. You don't love "about" someone, you love them for the person they are on the inside. You love them for the fact that they complete you as a person, that the two of you are better persons together than you are apart. I would take his statement to mean that he likes you based on how you look, what physical attributes you have that he admires, and I can tell you that as you grow older, all of that is going to change. My concern would be that when boobs begin to sag, and the muscle tone gives way, he's going to be looking for someone who looks better. I would take this as a good sign that this is not a man with whom I could grow old and I would not be wasting any more of my time on a shallow, petty man who thinks it's important that I have a flat stomach.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:09 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • If your DH is anything like mine he'll say anything that pops into his head sometimes, you just have to take it wih a grain of salt. Of course I would have been extremely offended too, but I would have mentioned it right then and there.
    GigantaursMommy

    Answer by GigantaursMommy at 11:12 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • It would hurt me. That's just him wishing you were the "ideal" woman which isn't very ideal b/c there aren't many who are like that. I think if you have a weight problem, and he comes to you and says he's concerned b/c of health issues, then yes, its being overly sensitive , but if you just have a normal stomach and not overweight, then he needs to keep that to himself.
    Mom_2_cuties

    Answer by Mom_2_cuties at 11:12 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Why is it that its ok for a woman to want to change her man physically when he starts gaining weight, its even encouraged here on Cm to "just tell him he's fat". But everyone jumps on a man that points out something (in a nice way at that) that he would be happy if you changed? That's such a double standard. Personally, I'd rather my husband tell me, then lie to me about it. So no, it wouldn't have hurt my feelings, it would have given me motivation to go to the gym.
    hobbitswife04

    Answer by hobbitswife04 at 11:15 AM on Jul. 12, 2010

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