Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Are you comfortable with your DH/SO going out with friends whom you've never met?

My SO has some friends from work, whom I do not know, that he went out with last week (to a few bars) now he wants to have a guy's only poker night with them and go brew beer with one of them at his house. I've never met these guys, except one in passing at his work while I was dropping off keys. I don't really feel comfortable with it. We had an issue with his work a few months back (i've been there twice) and he was acting VERY strangly with me and NOT loving at all. He didn't introduce me to anyone and didn't kiss me hello. I tried to explain to my SO that I feel weird about not knowing these people and him going out with them so often... But he thinks i'm just being paranoid. How do I handle this??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Jul. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • If you trust your husband you should not be worried about the other people. However, if he gives you reason to be suspicious and he acts differently around work people then that is not good.

    Answer by KTMOM at 12:23 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • If he was respectful to you,he'd have them stop over and do a meet and greet

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 12:24 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I wouldn't like the fact that he is acting strange and not wanting you to meet anyone, or even introduce you to anyone. If he wasn't acting so odd I wouldn't have a problem but his behavior is a red flag.


    Answer by RyansMom001 at 12:24 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I don't have a problem with it but again, he acts the same with me no matter who is around. It sounds like you 2 have a bigger problem than who he hangs around...sounds like something else is going on.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 12:25 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Nope, Hubby and I don't have girls and guys night out because we have a mutual respect for each other, and our relationship. Once in a while I have lunch with girlfriends, and he helps friends out with car repairs etc, but if it's a night out with friends we go together or we don't go... I think you both should take care of this before it gets more out of hand than it already is... GL

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 12:26 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • My DH goes to school and he has occasionally gone out with his school "friends".....I'm ok with it as long as it's in a group and not just a girl or something...even if they're married or not. He always talks about his school "friends" so I know them from what he tells me about them.

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 12:27 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • i dont know what to tell u about that my so has people he talks to outside of work but i might as well know them and tey basically know me he tells me all about them and they know alot about me lol i have even talked to most of them on the phone or something at some time or another but it wouldnt bother me if i didnt know them n he went out with them because i trust my so. I wouldnt worry so much about the way he acts towards u when he is around them because i know how some guys are around their male coworkers they dont wanna be looked at as whooped or whatever by them he may just be trying to be manly and cool u know

    Answer by Kelsmomma123 at 12:28 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Male married friends, sure. A group of single guys, mixed genders, or women would make me unhappy.

    Answer by IrishMommaC at 12:28 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I personally have no problem with it. But I trust my SO and he's never given me any reason not to. If you're not comfortable with the situation and all you are asking is to meet these people, then why not throw a BBQ and invite all of them over? I can totally understand that they want to do a "guys night" of poker without the wives and SO's. I know some of the guys I work with act like total pigs when they're together and don't like to have the wives around all the time because they WANT to act like pigs. LOL But when the wives do come for poker night (we play here at work almost every Friday), they are treated kindly. There's no funny business going on.

    Answer by BuddyRoo at 12:57 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.