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3 Bumps

What do you say to your 12 yr old daughter when she tells you she's bisexual? but hasn't had sex yet

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Asked by Scorpiolove68 at 1:07 PM on Jul. 12, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • she might be saying she has desires that might fall under bisexual~total mom points for her talking about stuff with you~

    Answer by surfcitymom at 1:09 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Ask her how she knows. Don"t freak out. and you have big mom points for her trusting you so much.

    Answer by lovinangels at 1:11 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • It's wonderful that you and your dd have such an open and honest relationship that she feels comfortable going to you with this. So yes major mom points for that! As for what to say to her, just ask her what makes her think that she is bisexual. She's at a really confusing age where she's just trying to figure herself out. Tell her that if she is bisexual, that you won't love her any differently. I'm sure that you will already cover this with her, but she needs to know that if she decides to "experiment" with it, that she needs to be just as careful with females as she does with males. GL

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 1:57 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I guess ask her why she thinks that..

    Answer by toastmama at 3:03 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I would hope to God she hadnt has sex yet... holy heck she is a baby.

    If she told me that I would give her a hug and explain that I really dont care if she is gay or straight but our rules are our rules.

    I could care less about her orientation it is the fact that she felt it exceptional that she "hadnt had sex yet" THAT would scare the hell out of me!  Of course you didnt have sex yet your TWELVE.  I would have that girl under lock and key if she even thought that not having sex at 12 was not the norm.

    Honestly her orientation is NOT the issue at hand here.... the fact that it even crossed her mind to tell you she hadnt had sex means that she is exposed to children having sex.  THAT should be your main concern here.


    Answer by sahlady at 3:34 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I say Okay, Great. I knew I was attracted to both men & women (or boys & girls) by the time I was 12. Although I had had experiences with both sexes at that point... I wouldn't have any issue with having a GLBT child...

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 5:21 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I say you are a great mom since your daughter trusts you enough to come to you about sex and sexual orientation.

    I would just give her a hug and tell her you love her no matter who she is attracted to, and then talk about how good it is to stay a virgin for quite some time still!

    Answer by kfroz0415 at 7:58 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • hug her and let her know it's ok

    Answer by krazymom2k03 at 2:06 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • First is confirming her love and thank her for the trust, dont freak out, with this topic, I think the best is to let her know that she is going thorough a lot of mental and body changes that can confuse her so she shouldnt worry or think too much about it but she needs to concentrate in what is best for her, like enjoying her life, studying, learn new stuff, sex is better managed when you have certain level of maturity, since is until when you are adult that you can manage better the comsecuences of what you do or don't do.

    Answer by keki81 at 9:23 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • Kids say things for shock value, maybe she is not serious, or she is confused, and needs your support.

    Answer by blue_glass_mama at 11:59 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

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