Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do I get him to trust me?

I am having trouble getting my fiance to trust me? He thinks I am a cheater based on the women in his past. He has been hurt before but no matter what I do or say he still doubts me.

Answer Question
 
tattooed_mom86

Asked by tattooed_mom86 at 10:34 PM on Jul. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (68 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • If you've not given him a reason to think this then he needs to let it go. This seems to be a big red flag...if he thinks you are a cheater then why did he ask you to marry him? Seems odd.
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 10:39 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • depends on weather this is serious or not . if it is then you need to have a long talk with him . tell him that you relize that he has been hurt in the past but you are not that person. If your dating why would it matter if you were dating or seeing someone else ? let him know that while you think he is a wonderful man that you are not cheating and that he has no reason to not trust you . let him know if he can't trust you maybe he is not ready for a relationship.
    dodie_s

    Answer by dodie_s at 10:40 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Trust is only earned through action.

    You can tell him to trust you until the cows come home..

    But it's your actions in the ends that will help him learn and grow to trust you.

    Eventually his insecurities should subside. As long as you are trustworthy.

    There is always a chance that his damage/baggage is deep and it will be a long haul to earn his trust. And he may be so insecure that he will just never allow himself to trust no matter how trustworthy you have proven yourself to be. IF this turns out to be the case, then there's a chance that this relationship.. Just isn't a good relationship for either of you.. But that's a bridge to cross if/when you come to it.
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 10:44 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • you are in for a long and difficult marriage if he is unwilling to trust you from the get go (assuming you have never given him any reason not to).  Perhaps you should rethink your choice or at least put it off a bit until his is healthy.

    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 10:44 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I am going through this also and it is a hard situation to deal with :(
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 11:56 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • why did he ask you to marry him? Seems odd.
    randerykah

    Answer by randerykah at 1:49 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN