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4 Bumps

How could you just give away your family member?

when i see moms on here say if there teenage daughter came home pregnant and didnt want to keep it, they would tell her to give it up for adoption, it really just makes me sick! how could you not care that you had a family member, YOUR GRANDCHILD, your babys baby floating around somewhere in this world not being a part of your family?? i just dont get it! how could you do that! family is family. its the most important special thing ever and you could just give it away like its a piece of garbage you sell at a garage sale! you women are freaks imo just so you know


Asked by PURPULbutterfly at 11:20 PM on Jul. 12, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 23 (17,427 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (48)
  • I placed a child for adoption when I was 18, I will tell you one of the reasons I did so is because my family told me to get out of their house, I won't go into the issues I encountered to keep my child but I will never understand how my parents could cast me out with no support, keeping it a secret and refusing to help me. Their own grandchild, I guess some people don't love their families enough to keep them together. You can say its for the better of both of them, but adoption is not rainbows and ponies there are good and bad stories. Purple I agree with you - although I wouldn't say its like tossing out garbage or directly babyselling. But its sad that many people don't have the facts...I'm scared of the day I meet my son who is Bipolar, started drinking at 13 nearly killing himself. What will he say to me about me giving him away after learning the reasons and wondering how I kept his bio-brother 2yrs later.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 1:38 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • it's not at all like selling a baby at a garage sale. it's better than killing a child. i'd rather give them a chance to live and make a woman a mother who can not otherwise have children.

    Answer by jennifer588 at 11:22 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • You shouldn't judge. You can't force someone to keep their child, especially if its unwanted by the parents. If it was me and my daughter wanted to go the adoption route, I'd support her but see if she'd be willing to do an open adoption. Now, if I had the means to adopt the child myself, I probably would.

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 11:24 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Looking at what's in the best interest of my child, and the child they bare isn't exactly what I would call "easy"..
    But sometimes in life even the hardest,. most unfathomable things are the best things to do.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 11:24 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • When you adopt a baby out, it's not only giving it life, but a life with a mom and a dad that may not be able to have a child themselves. It's the idea of giving that baby a whole and normal life, rather than a mother who didn't want her baby to begin with. Some moms never ever get used to having a baby....I know a few people like this who have had babies, kept them and they struggle with giving the child a life it deserves and love and attention.

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 11:28 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Ugh I've seen you on here before.... You're not giving away a family member... You are giving a family member a chance at a better life. Knowing that their life is better because someone who truly wanted them and were in a position to have them should be all that matters. Adoption is so selfless, I would never be strong enough to do it.

    Answer by Georgie0502 at 11:30 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • careful when you say 'never'. My husband and I said many times we would never raise another child. Thats all well and fine until a law enforcement agency shows up and says "if you can't take them they go to foster care". We love our grandkids very much, but we did not want to raise them. Sometimes the only choice is step up or condemn a child to an existance that is tortuous.
    They have been with us over 5 yrs now, fully adopted....and I can't imagine NOT having them here now. You can't say what you'll do until you're in the situation. I urge you to take care in judging others decisions.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:34 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I'd rather give the child up for adoption to a family that would love and cherish the child instead of having the child grow up feeling that they are resented or a burden.

    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 11:42 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • I've never met an infant, a newborn baby, that has known the difference between biological family and non bio family.

    All they know is love, safety, warmth and caring.... And THOSE are the things that matter when raising a child. Not biology and genetics.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 11:45 PM on Jul. 12, 2010

  • Giving an unplanned baby up for adoption is the most selfless, loving act a mother can do for her baby. Especially a young mom who can't support herself much less her baby. How in the world can you criticize a girl for loving her child so much that she chooses to give it life & a better life than she can give it?? What would you rather, that she bring her baby in to the world, & struggle to raise it in poverty, not possessing the life skills necessary to make it possible to provide it with a proper home, food, clothes etc? So many people judge others for giving their children a better life through adoption, yet have no problem with children being raise in poverty by an ill-equipped single mom, or worse yet, feel the baby should be aborted. Aborting an unplanned baby, or raising a child in poverty & hardship is what is cruel, heartless & selfish.

    Answer by ghostwriter777 at 11:46 PM on Jul. 12, 2010