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An offer then a back out of it.

Ok a few weeks ago my boyfriend offered to mow my lawn - I do so much for him and he knows it- Says I am the nicest and sweetest woman he has ever been with. Well I dont usually let anyone do anything for me and it took a lot of energy to even agree to letting him mow since I dont trust anyone to do anything for me. So The day he is to come over around 2 to mow for me. He tells me that he is golfing and that its running late and that he wont be able to do it.
I got upset and cried about it. I felt that I let my guard down enough to let him actually do something for me. but then he cant even handle that. He thought he did no wrong, but that he was nice cause he let me know a head of time that he wasnt going to make it.
He still to this day brings up the fact that I am to emotional and that I was to emotional that day. He thinks I shouldnt have been upset. What would u do? or how would u feel?


Asked by Anonymous at 11:48 AM on Jul. 13, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Did he ever end up mowing your lawn?
    Youre not too emotional...considering how you have built up a wall around youself to protect yourself from getting hurt..its understandable to be upset and to feel let down when you allow yourself to let someone care for you and the moment that you do, they do exactly what you feared and that was to let you down. He needs to understand that it runs deeper than just not showing up to mow the werent crying about were emotional because of the situation and circumstance.
    Men have a hard time understanding that about women sometimes...they only seem to understand black and white and not the grey in between sometimes unless it is slowly spelled out for them.
    If you truly care for him..I would give him another chance.Good Luck, hope it all works out for ya.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 12:00 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • I would take this as a sign that he is a man who does not keep his word, especially if a more attractive offer comes by. Not all men are like this, so tell this one you want a man who honors his word and therefore, this is not a match. It is so much better to learn the true character of a man early on, so be thankful you know who he really is and get rid of him now before you allow yourself to become any more emotionally attached. Emotional?? How about showing him the emotion of anger?

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:51 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • I think that when someone says they'll do something for you, they should. If he can't keep his word about something, even if it's just mowing the lawn because his golfing is running late, he doesn't sound very trustworthy. Sure sometimes things come up but if the reason he can't make it is because he was out having fun is not in the realm of something coming up at the last minute.

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 11:56 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • That was and is a natural reaction for any woman is letting down her gaurd to let someone in. Obviously you have been let down alot and have issues in faith and trust in the oppisite sex, and he needs to understand this but he can only do it if you tell him why you have such issues in the first place. More opening up and revealing I know, but how else will you know if its worth it unless you give him the chance to step up or mess up!? But you are the only one who is capable and will decide what you are willing to put up with and what you aren't. He did call to say he was running late and may not make it, which is a plus because some men won't even do that; but don't brush it off just yet, see if its a consistant issue and go from there! GL and BW!!!

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 11:56 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • If he said he'll do it the next day and you cried maybe I'd say you were too emotional. To promise to do it and back out that day PLUS he didn't do it later is a very crappy thing to do to someone.

    Answer by Sara.Robyson at 11:54 AM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • No he never did end up mowing my lawn. He doesnt do much for me in comparison to most men Ive been with. But he is sweeter and more loving.

    Answer by MommySteph1011 at 12:05 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • Just know that he may let you down on more than just this occasion. Stick to doing the major stuff on your own, no disappointments.

    Answer by Chipmunk2771 at 1:18 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • I don't think you were crying about your lawn not being mowed. (God I hope not! LOL) I think you were crying because the rational, logical side of you just got the lightbulb moment when you realize that someone isn't all you had hoped and then your emotional side caught wind of it.

    If he had called and said, "Hey honey, I was going to mow today, but I'm not done with golfing yet. I'll take care of it tomorrow though." and then he DID? Well, no problem. Shoot, I put off mowing my yard if something more fun comes up. A day isn't going to matter.

    But when someone no call/no shows AND doesn't follow through? I think that's a pretty good indication of that person's priorities/values.

    Answer by BuddyRoo at 1:39 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • I would be disappointed and figure he is selfish BUT...I wouldn't cry. THAT won't get you anywhere. Men hate to see a woman cry about certain things...they think you are a cry baby or manipulating. I would get tough and confront him about his offer that he didn't come through on. But don't cry....LOL.

    Answer by gertie41 at 6:43 PM on Jul. 13, 2010