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How do you talk with your 12 year old daughter who is hurt by a boy?

She is only 12. I feel she does not need to worry about boys right now. Ahhh... it's frustrating sometimes! I love her and don't want to see her hurt. It's the summer and I thought maybe we could take a break from it since school is out, but no, it is the same as being in school. Boy crazy... Lord, bless me with peace and understanding!! :-)

Answer Question
 
coffeemom39

Asked by coffeemom39 at 10:37 PM on Jul. 13, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 2 (6 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • You can't protect your childrens hearts...soooo hard ): Just be there and love her.
    Cochise

    Answer by Cochise at 10:39 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • Give her a pep talk! Tell her all about how men are a waste of time and that she is wayyy to pretty to be hangin out with that loser anyway. Also tell her she has plenty of time for boys but not that much time to be young. Watch some chic flics with her, and paint each others nails. Tell her to have a sleepover and keep her mind off the boy.
    xmama_bellax

    Answer by xmama_bellax at 10:40 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • My husband has been very clean with our Girls from early on...Boys are scum....they only want one thing...With that being said We've encourage our Girls to focus on themselfs not on Boys!
    sillyme85

    Answer by sillyme85 at 10:40 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • The same way you would if she was 17 or 22... The pain of relationships doesn't change with age... I don't know why you would think 12 is to young to be interested in boys, her hormones surely aren't going to wait til YOU are comfortable. I know no one likes to hear that but it's the truth! It's a part of life and she will get over it, as a parent it's your job to be there to listen and be supportive.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 10:41 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • I deal with this alot as a Teacher, let her know that it is wayyyyy to early to be concerned, to be the smart girl after college boys will find her and that all that matters now is your love for her, her love for herself and her education!
    CraftyMom2511

    Answer by CraftyMom2511 at 10:46 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • I explained to my boys early on that relationships were hard work, and that being involved too early is a waste of time and engery when they should spend their time with friends, focusing on school and having time for themselves. I've continued to tell them both that its not important at there ages to be involved at the level where girls mean more to them, than their futures. It just causes heartache for everyone. Both my boys are interested in girls and they both have plenty of girl friends, my older son doesn't date (he will be a sophmore this year), he has no desire - he says girls will come when he's in college on his path to success. My younger son is going through his hormone stage and fitting in where all the 5 & 6 graders have a gf or bf...he's learning the hard way girls are a pain and has "broken up" twice because of it and says he's done until college. A good conversation may help her understand.
    blessedwboysx3

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 11:24 PM on Jul. 13, 2010

  • The best thing you can do is tell her when she needs to talk to someone, that you will be there for her, no matter what. Just don't be critical about her thoughts, there is only so much we can do as a mother. There are some things that they have to learn themselves.
    You can always offer an opinion, just don't tell her what to do.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:32 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • Let her cry and go easy on her for a couple days. i.e. stop for a milkshake on the way home from the stroe, let her watch a movie even if its technically past bedtime or w/e
    JacyB

    Answer by JacyB at 1:52 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • This is one of many hurts to come none of which you have any control over, just be there for her and try to distract her.
    older

    Answer by older at 2:13 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • Ladies, thank you so much for your advice, it means a lot. I will take everything to heart. God Bless... :-))
    coffeemom39

    Comment by coffeemom39 (original poster) at 10:10 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

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