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Spin off: What do you consider cheating?

Is thinking cheating? Just thinking of another person, whether your SO knows it or not, is that cheating?

Are emotional feelings for another person without getting physical cheating?

Answer Question
 
GinNTonic

Asked by GinNTonic at 2:25 AM on Jul. 14, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (6,147 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I dont think it is, if you acted of those feeling then yes thats cheating. I think it human nature to "think" about other...but i could be wrong :/
    DilsMommy

    Answer by DilsMommy at 2:26 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • I honestly would not consider it cheating if my husband was thinking "oh wow" if a woman walked by that he thought was attractive or something like that. If he has strong emotional feelings for another woman that directly affects his relationship with me we'd probably need to have a conversation about the future of our relationship for his happiness and mine. However, "cheating" to me is the physical effort to be with someone else....dating, having sex, etc.
    ShaunnaMichelle

    Answer by ShaunnaMichelle at 2:29 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • If my DH told me he was thinking of another woman in that way.. I would admire his honesty and not consider it cheating at all. I'd prolly not trust him alone with her though.
    MomtoElliett

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 2:31 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • If he just thinks a woman looks good as she walks by and that's it, no. If he's making en effort to think about another woman and what he would like to do with her, then yes, I consider that cheating. And anything more than that.
    montanagal2005

    Answer by montanagal2005 at 2:34 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • I think of it as a platform to cheating- something in your life is allowing you to think about others- if that something gets worse, you may allow yourself to pursue it. For example, my husband had a job that he was gone 2-4wks at a time out of state, I had a really good guy friend that lived nearby and he would come check on me and the kids and anytime my truck had problems, he'd come take care of it for me. Before I knew it he was stopping by to hang out...and then my husband stayed out longer and longer, and my friend was there more than my husband. It got to be a problem when my friend was complaining his gf was always out with friends- we had a lot of "lonely" issues in common....we stopped hanging out before it went too far, and I confronted my husband about what almost happened. He soon quit his job and found something closer to home and we've been great ever since. If you're thinking about others- take it as a warning.
    KariLyn84

    Answer by KariLyn84 at 2:36 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • I have Kari, and I never allowed it to get physical, but the damage I nearly caused was enough to keep myself from even THINKING about another man. Even if there's no chance in hell with him.
    GinNTonic

    Comment by GinNTonic (original poster) at 2:38 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • Peoples actions speak really loud. If two people come in contact then that is cheating but, thinking of some one is not cheating.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 2:38 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • I would consider that emotional cheating. I know I wouldn't like it if my husband did that and would consider it betrayal.
    babyangelromero

    Answer by babyangelromero at 3:33 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • In our marriage, yes Lusting after another person is cheating.
    RheaF

    Answer by RheaF at 7:35 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • Thinking isn't cheating, though it's gonna cause problems if it's found out. Big problems here. There is emotional cheating as well as physical cheating. But I do agree, thinking about another man, or woman, is a platform for cheating. It's a gateway I guess, like they say pot is the gateway drug? It can lead to more. If it makes YOU feel bad, then what does that tell you? If something YOU do makes you feel bad, then it's the wrong thing to do. Period.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 8:23 AM on Jul. 14, 2010

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