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siblings kissing and very defiant

i have caught my 3yr old son and 5yr old daughter on top of each other kissing. its very hard to explain to them that its morally and ethically wrong but its hard because mommy and daddy have came frome sexually abusive backgrounds and its a touchy subject. any ideas on how to explain this to my children, it seems like the more i try to correct them the more they do it, the zig when i tell them to zag ect..... please help me.....

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Asked by bimommy05 at 8:37 PM on Jul. 14, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • If you and their dad can't talk to them about it then you need to find someone who can. What have you tried telling them so far?

    Answer by Ati_13 at 8:40 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • I would say ignore it for the most part. When you see it, simple state "nope, we don't do that". They are very young. There is nothing "wrong" with them doing it. It's just something they are either imitating or something they came up with on their own.

    Answer by MotherofIreland at 8:42 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • DO NOT ignore it! Whatever you do, DO NOT ignore it. I would try to speak to them further, and if it doesn't work...find someone that can relate to them, a therapist or counselor, and let them try. Seriously...too many kids are molesting other kids b/c they don't think its wrong. NOT saying in any way that thats whats happening or going on, but you really never know what COULD happen in the future.

    Answer by Amanda52007 at 8:48 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • Scare them. Tell them that they will get some sort of disease or deformation. cooties. get the boogy man involved. They are little kids, they arent going to undertand morals.

    Answer by xmama_bellax at 8:59 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • don't think I'd ignore it either.
    not acusing you or your husband, but are you sure that one or both of them haven't been molested?
    do you or your husband have siblings where this may have happened?
    I'd get them to a counselor personally.
    I'm usually very open about things, but I think this bears some looking into-

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:01 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • please ignore the whole scare suggestions- if you threaten them with something that isn't true, they are going to know then not trust anything you say. I saw so because people always tried to scare me like that when I was a kid.
    just showed me they were full of c*ap.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:03 PM on Jul. 14, 2010

  • Don't ignore it, but don't overreact, either. Just break them up and say that brothers and sisters don't do that. That's something that only mommies and daddies do. Brothers and sisters show love for each other by hugs (and show them how you want them to hug each other) and kisses on the cheek (if you're okay with that) and holding hands (again if you're okay with that) or whatever you want them to do to show affection for each other.

    You'll probably have to repeat yourself because they'll probably do the same things a few times after the first time you tell them. But remind them how to show affection and praise them when they show affection to each other the way you want them to.

    Answer by May-20 at 8:38 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • I wouldn't ignore it and I certainly would not try and scare them. They are kids, not stupid. Explain to them that is not the type of kissing brothers and sisters do. Tell them which kind they can do and leave it alone.

    Answer by buzymamaof3 at 1:46 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

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