Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

10 Bumps

I shouldn't have to pay for my past mistakes any longer... He told me he was ashamed of me and called me a whore.

When I was in my teen years, I got around sexually. A lot. I was also a meth addict. I'm not proud of the things i've done and i've been torn down by previous boyfriends for it. I've spent the last 3 years trying to fix the mistakes i've made. I have a 4 yr old DD, and I feel that now I am an excellent mother to her. I've got a steady job and I make good money a home everything is great for me and my DD now. My SO and I have been together for a year, I was honest with him about the things i've done since day one. He has help underlying anger and resentment towards me for it this whole time. Yesterday he asked me what a nickname meant (I was called Vee in high school) and I told him he wouldn't want to know, he demanded, so I told him it was because I used to get with a lot of girls. He flipped out and told me he was ashamed of me and that I was a whore. I have been 100% honest and faithful to him. How long should I have to pay


Asked by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Jul. 15, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (42)
  • You shouldn't have to pay at all. Seriously, that was past mistakes and that stuff should stay in the shouldn't have to be "forgiven" by people you are with......If it is that big of a deal to them, then they shouldn't get into a relationship with you...that's only fair to you and to them. I'm sorry that your having to deal with this, but like I said you shouldn't have to pay for anything you've done, especially since it wasn't like you were with them at the time and wronged them! I would get out of this relationship if he's going to continue to get angry at you and to tear you down. That's not something you need or should be around!!! xoxoxo

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 10:58 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • You shouldn't have to pay at all. That is your past and not you now. If your boyfriend cannot handle your past he shouldn't be with aren't that person now. You do not deserve to pay or be punished for it.

    Answer by keyaziz at 10:57 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • sounds like you have apid your debt
    he is still ivinf with it, as he finds out stuff from your past
    he is making it your present
    you have put in past
    you two are not on smae time level

    is he worth it? i mean does he treat you right? sounds like he treats you not for who you are now, or even who yu have been the last year with him
    unfair, but maybe he can get past with some therapy, he is making your past an issue because he has some issues?/

    Answer by fiatpax at 10:57 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • If he can't be supportive of you and how you have turned your life around then he needs to hit the road.

    Answer by Memigen at 10:57 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • You SHOULDN'T have to pay any longer. He should stop and realize how he is affecting you. He is being an ass.

    You have been open and honest which is more than a lot of people can say.

    And besides.. aren't most guys turned on by that type of thing? Lol... if my bf found out I used to get with girls he would say, "Hell yeah!" ;)

    Answer by Memigen at 10:57 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • I say no and that if he can't accept you for who you are now.. forget him!

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 11:04 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • let it roll off you~if he can't hang with it~Oh well, his loss...another example of why tell about our pasts to men~they have too much testosterone to handle it~

    Answer by surfcitymom at 10:58 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • I'm with Keyaziz, you shouldn't have to pay at all. You did all of the stuff you did before you even knew him. I would kick his ass to the curb! (sorry I don't mean that to be rude!)

    Answer by FatGirl239 at 10:58 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • This might only get worse. Be good to yourself and rethink this realtionship before you end up making a huge mistake for yourself and any future kids.

    Answer by elizabr at 11:00 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • he needs to grow up im sure he wasnt the golden child when he was younger, men always want to look down on women and judge use for the same things hey have done and all they do is add points to their coolness and slap 5's with their friends.... If you know you are doing nothing wrong then thats all that matters you and your baby ignore his smart remarks you are older and have opened your eyes to your new life

    Answer by MsShoate313 at 11:01 AM on Jul. 15, 2010