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When your with your child and they are around other children who don't belong to you (LOL) how do you "deal" with the other kids' bad behavior?

Just a random example, we were at a birthday party for my cousin the other day and my daughter was playing with my cousins DD. My DD had a toy and my cousins DD (they're about the same age) came over and snatched a toy (that belonged to my DD) from my DD's hands. Well (considering no one was watching her and it is not my job to dicipline someone elses' kid) I just told my DD (who was crying) that it was ok, she needs to share, and we could go outside and play instead. Then it was a big deal to everyone that my DD was upset. In situations like this, do you just ignore the other kids' bad behavior, tell THEM to share, get their mom (who doesn't care)? I feel like I am constantly telling my cousin her kid is doing this or that, but quite frankly, I'm not the kids' parent, it isn't up to me to watch her all the time.

 
FatGirl239

Asked by FatGirl239 at 11:41 AM on Jul. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

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Answers (14)
  • I do the same thing.. if it were my kids toy I would have grabbed it back and went outside with DD
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 11:42 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • In my encounters i spoke to the childs parent.
    MTM

    Answer by MTM at 11:42 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • if it is my house, I set the limits and talk to the kids about modifying their behavior. If we are at the other kids house our in public, I will pull my kids aside and remind them to act right and help the "wild ones" be safe and sane and really do the rules (my famous line the kid's will quote is Mom doesn't want to be in the ER on a holiday).
    surfcitymom

    Answer by surfcitymom at 11:46 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • If a kid is at my house, they follow my rules, it's that simple. Someone else's house, I just let my kids deal with the situation on their own the best they can and if it gets out of hand, I talk to the parents. If it's really bad, we leave.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 11:49 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • No, it's not right for another child to snatch my daughters toy from her hands. I would have spoken to the parent, gotten the toy back and tell my daughter to not allow someone to snatch toys from them.
    It is ok to share toys if she gives it to another child but for a child to snatch it from her is not right.
    DesertRose75

    Answer by DesertRose75 at 11:51 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • If another child yanks a toy out of one of my kids hands, I will take it from the child who took it and put it up.
    Decker

    Answer by Decker at 11:51 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • If that happened to my DD and I was close enough, I would take the toy out of the cousins hand and give it back to DD and tell the cousin that it wasn't very nice of him to do that. If I wasn't there and DD walked up to me and told me about it, after having it happen, I'd tell her "that wasn't very nice of him was it, I'm sorry that happened, but would you like to do this instead... " except if the toy was precious to her. Then I would go get it back from the cousin. If it was just a random toy that I brought along though, I'd prolly just try to distract her with something else.
    MomtoElliett

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 11:45 AM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • You said the other child was your family correct? I've had situations in which a cousin did this with one of my kids. I mean kids are kids, I approached the child and I just told her that snatching was not nice and that everyone needed to share the toys or they would be taken away. But this was family, a complete stranger at a party, I would probably do what you did, I would find something else for my LO to play with.
    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 12:06 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • Oh ok, I had to re-read, it was your daughter's toy. I would of went up to the child and still told her it's not nice to snatch and if she asked nicely your DD can share her toy. I would of made her give your DD back the toy and made the child ask your DD if she could use it (again this is if it is family). And if the other parent got upset then I would explain to them what their child did. For a stranger I would of simply gone up to the child and asked for the toy back and said "that is my daughter's toy can I have it back, she's playing with it", and maybe found another toy or help the child find another toy to play with.
    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 12:10 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • I hear ya!
    if the other parents are there, I would just tell them what happened. if they are left in your care, then it's a different story. that's a matter on deciding with the parents as to what you should do to discipline them.

    if you are around a kid and the parents are somewhere else, and the child does something unsafe or is hurting someone, then I say by all means correct the child to keep everyone safe. you can say something to them without disciplining them.
    I think that people can say all they want to things like 'not your kid, then do nothing no matter what'
    then if you are around and a kid gets hurt, then you better believe they'll try to blame YOU and anyone they could possibly think of! except themselves for the fact that they weren't watching their own kid.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

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